Jack and Sophia Have Grown Up and Now Face the Challenges of Parenting Teenagers

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My 16-year-old, Ethan, is far more thoughtful than I ever was at his age and definitely more cautious. Sometimes, I get so caught up in nagging him about what needs to be done next that I forget to appreciate the amazing qualities he has. However, this summer, I’m really enjoying watching him blossom into the young man he’s becoming. Since I “forgot to plan his summer” (hey, he’s the third kid, after all!), he’s taken the initiative to find some odd jobs on his own.

He tends to a neighbor’s lawn and garden, walks another neighbor’s husband who isn’t feeling well, and makes daily visits to his grandmother where he plays with her dog and listens to her stories. He’s also the go-to tech support for his other grandmother and the fishing guide for his younger cousins and friends. Plus, he spends countless hours on the basketball court, working hard to improve his skills in a sport he loves. He’s determined, kind, and has a great sense of humor.

As he heads out to work, he often asks me for advice on which weeds to pull, and I make sure to remind him about the perils of yard work: wear sunscreen, a hat, gloves, and insect repellent. And, of course, watch out for poison ivy. I still remember the dreadful case I had as a teenager—nothing like that itchy reminder of youthful mischief! Yet, somehow turning 50 doesn’t feel nearly as itchy. My friends in their 60s and 70s, along with my parents nearing 80, assure me that I’m still young. But sometimes, it feels like I’m slowly coming down the mountain.

The other night, Ethan came to sit at the end of my bed, just like he does most nights to say goodnight. He had just returned from a party and said, “A girl told me I looked good tonight. It was weird.” Moments like those are precious, and I cherish them. He really is quite handsome—maybe even someone’s idea of “heaven.” He’s 16 and definitely on his way up.

Maybe I should just be content knowing I’ve walked this path before him, offering a few words of wisdom about the potential bumps ahead. I can’t predict which songs will define his teenage years or what soundtracks he’ll carry into adulthood. They’re still in that phase of blasting beats and love songs, anthems and protests. The music that feels so significant to them will play on the oldies station someday, much like my favorites do now.

Even at almost 50, I still enjoy a good tune. The other day, I heard one of Simon & Garfunkel’s classics, and a particular line struck me as just about perfect: “Now the years are rolling by me. They’re rockin’ evenly.” I’m older than I was, yet younger than I will be.

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In summary, parenting a teenager is a journey filled with moments of pride and nostalgia. As they navigate their own path, we cherish the memories of our youth while offering guidance when needed.