10 Things I’d Approach Differently as a Parent

home insemination Kit

As my neighborhood welcomes a wave of enthusiastic new moms and their perfectly dressed kiddos, I can’t help but reflect on my own parenting journey. With my children now in elementary and middle school, I’ve had plenty of time to ponder both the triumphs and the blunders (mostly blunders) of those early years. If I had a chance to do it all over again, here are ten things I would definitely adjust:

1. No More Hamsters: Honestly, why did I think owning hamsters was a good idea? The stress of keeping those little furballs alive was ridiculous. I spent more time cleaning their cage than my own house, and they still ended up passing away. If I can’t handle a 4-ounce rodent, how am I supposed to raise two kids? Plus, having mouse traps in our garage while trying to keep our hamsters alive? It’s like being a rodent serial killer with a side gig in parenting.
2. Avoid Over-Scheduling Toys: My daughter’s American Girl doll ended up with a packed schedule, trying all sorts of activities but never sticking with any. I get it, the allure is real, but can we talk about the disappointment? I can just imagine her at the American Girl therapy center saying, “I quit everything!”
3. British Accents for All: I genuinely believe things would be smoother if we all spoke with a British accent. A polite “Mummy, I missed the loo” sounds way better than “I peed on the floor again.” Just imagine how civilized our arguments would be!
4. Skip Disney World with Toddlers: Taking a 3 and 5-year-old to Disney World? It felt like we were racing against the clock, trying to hit every attraction while lugging around snacks, water, and two exhausted kids. By the end, we were all cranky and sweaty, and our prize was barely a minute on Dumbo.
5. No More Baby Einstein Obsession: Sure, my kids could name barnyard animals and colors like pros thanks to those videos, but did that skill translate to anything useful in school? I want a refund on that time!
6. Hold Off on Sports: Our son started soccer at 3 and retired by 5. Now he wishes he had stuck with it longer, but honestly, his decision-making skills back then were questionable at best. If your kid isn’t passionate, wait until they’re older. There will be plenty of time for freezing on the sidelines.
7. Lying About Kids’ Menus: If I had told my kids the kids’ menu had fancy options like arugula salad or rack of lamb, they might not be so hooked on pizza and chicken nuggets.
8. Skip the Extravagant Classes: I spent so much money on music and gym classes for my toddler, thinking it would have them mastering skills. But really, all they needed was to jump in a ball pit at home! What was the point of those pricey classes?
9. One LEGO Set, Rewrapped: I’d buy my son one large LEGO set and just rewrap it for every birthday. He was obsessed at first, but eventually, he was too scared to play with his masterpieces. It’s like I fell into a marketing trap with those colorful bricks.
10. No Big Birthday Bashes for Little Ones: We threw our son a massive Spider-Man party when he was 2, but years later, he didn’t even remember it. Kids go to so many parties that they can’t keep track. Snap a few pics at someone else’s party, and you’re golden!

So that’s my list. Hopefully, you can learn from my missteps. And just a quick note: if you hear someone say “it goes by so fast,” just nod and smile.

For more ideas on home insemination, check out this helpful post. And if you’re on a fertility journey, Make a Mom can be a great resource. For those considering intrauterine insemination, Hopkins Medicine offers excellent information.

In summary, parenting is a wild ride filled with lessons learned from our mistakes. Embrace the chaos, and don’t be afraid to rethink your strategies as you go!