Why I’m So Grateful My Teen Daughter’s a Nerd

home insemination Kit

By: Jamie Collins

You won’t believe the story I heard from my husband the other day. As he relaxed with a drink, he shared a laugh about a conversation he had with his colleague, Mike, who has a daughter the same age as my own, C.

“What’s up?” I asked, busy chopping veggies for dinner.

“Mike came into the office looking frazzled and said, ‘Is the vibe at your house all messed up because of that One Direction breakup?’”

I burst out laughing. “What did you say?”

“I told him that C. couldn’t care less about One Direction. If it were something like Benedict Cumberbatch quitting his role in Sherlock or the cancellation of Doctor Who, then sure, there’d be tears. But One Direction? Please.”

I smiled, grateful that our kid inherited our nerdy traits. “C. did mention some girls at school were in complete meltdown mode about it, though. Crying and everything!”

“Yeah, Mike said it’s emotional chaos. Whining and constant texting. Total drama fest.”

“Zayn,” I said, shaking my head. “Who even names their kid that?”

Later that evening, I got a message from my friend, Sara, whose daughter, Mia, is also 13.

“Mia is dealing with some nasty bullying from her friends,” she wrote. “They’re all obsessed with One Direction, and Mia just isn’t into it anymore. When she said it doesn’t matter, they turned on her. Now she’s getting mean texts and awful messages on Facebook.”

“That’s insane,” I replied. “How’s Mia holding up?”

“She’s upset but talking to me about it, which I’m thankful for. I told her it was silly and to ignore them, but those girls actually blurred her face out of every group photo they posted online.”

Reading that sent a chill through me. Even as times change, some things never do. I recalled my own experience before seventh grade when a group of “friends” decided I was the next to be excluded.

One summer day, a boy from my class called out of the blue. “Hey, did you hear what your friends did?”

My heart sank as he told me they had burned every picture that included me.

The message was clear: Without us, you don’t exist. At just 13, I didn’t know who I was yet, and deep down, part of me believed them.

Fast forward to this weekend. My husband and I took C. and her younger sister to the mall. I stepped away for a moment and later, my husband couldn’t help but grin as he recalled a funny moment.

“C. was horrified when I took her into Sephora. She said, ‘What’s going on? This store sells makeup and stuff!’”

I turned to C., who rolled her eyes but smiled a little. “What’s wrong with makeup?”

“Gross! Popular girls use makeup, and all they care about is boys. No way am I wearing that!”

As I watched her swing joyfully in the backyard later, I felt a mix of pride and worry. “She’s an awesome kid, but I worry about her sometimes,” I confessed to my husband. “Kids can be so mean at this age.”

“But she’s smart,” he reassured me. “You know we were nerds too, right? And look at us now.”

“True, but do you think she really believes that?” I asked.

“I think she’s just fine. Enjoy her for who she is.”

So I took a breath and watched her play, my quirky, intelligent daughter with wild curls, swinging higher and higher.

In those moments, I felt grateful for her nerdiness, knowing it would help her navigate the ups and downs of adolescence.

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Summary

This article reflects on the challenges of raising a teenager in a world of peer pressure and bullying, particularly highlighting the importance of embracing one’s nerdiness as a strength. The author shares personal anecdotes about their daughter, who proudly identifies as a nerd and navigates adolescence with confidence, contrasting her experience with that of her peers who are caught up in trends and social drama.