I adore the affectionate nature of my kids; their touchy-feely ways bring me so much joy. There’s something heartwarming about when they gently stroke my face to offer comfort or express love. Just a few months back, I was feeling down about something, and my 5-year-old came up to me with concern written all over her face. She cupped my cheek with her sweet little hand and said, “It’s OK, Mama, I love you.”
But then it happened—my heart melted only to be met with a dreadful reality. The moment her hand touched my cheek, a familiar, rancid odor hit my nose, and I instinctively pulled away. It was the unmistakable scent of a child’s rear end. What should have been a tender moment was ruined by the realization that her hand was not as clean as I’d hoped. This experience marked a turning point for me. From that day forward, I decided that no child’s hand would touch my face without a prior inspection for cleanliness. Here’s why:
- Potential for Poo: If your child is between 0 to 8 years old, there’s a pretty good chance that there might be some poop lurking on their hands. You’d be horrified to find what can hide under those tiny fingernails. And trust me, whatever you do, resist the urge to sniff any dark substances you might find; you’ll regret it.
- Boogers Galore: Nose-picking is a rite of passage for many, kids especially. The problem is that their hygiene practices often leave much to be desired. They rarely wash their hands unless specifically told to do so. So, if you allow little Chloe to fondly touch your face with her sticky hands, be prepared for a lovely surprise in the form of a mucus face mask.
- Curious Exploration: Kids are naturally curious, and sometimes that means exploring their bodies in ways that may not be ideal for face contact. If little Henry wants to give you a playful squeeze, be sure to conduct a sniff test first. If his hands have been anywhere near his backside, you might want to think twice about letting him come close.
- Food Residue: While this might not seem too terrible, just spend some time in a kindergarten classroom, and you’ll quickly change your mind. Those little hands can get into all sorts of foods, and I’m not keen on having remnants of their lunch smeared across my face. Yogurt, for instance, once dried, can smell a lot worse than you’d think.
- Creature Curiosities: Kids have an uncanny ability to find the grossest stuff outside. Whether it’s worms, dead bugs, or who knows what else, you can never be too sure what they’ve been handling. I’ve seen my 5-year-old lovingly hold everything from tiny critters to questionable substances, so I’d rather not risk any contact until I know those hands are clean.
So, to all the unsuspecting adults out there who love to hug and kiss those cute little hands—consider this a friendly warning. Your kids’ hands might not be as clean as you think. If you want to steer clear of an unexpected encounter with some funky odors, remember to wash and sniff as necessary. Trust me; it’s worth it!
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In summary, while I cherish the affection my children show me, I’ve learned to be cautious about allowing those little hands to touch my face. A quick sniff test can save you from some truly unpleasant surprises!