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What I Quietly Wished for Mother’s Day
Hey there, friends! So, Mother’s Day rolled around, and while breakfast in bed is a lovely thought, I’m more of a Raisin Bran kind of person. But those homemade pancakes? Wow! Your sweet intentions fill my heart with love, and I can’t help but shower your little faces with kisses. Thanks, kiddos!
And to my wonderful husband, that chic designer tennis dress you chose for me is adorable, really! But let’s be honest—I’m not a size 2 anymore, and I haven’t got the height of a model. (Just because Lycra is an option doesn’t mean it should be a reality for me.) I’ve had two kids and, oh yeah, I’m in my forties now.
Family, you mean the world to me, which is why I’ll always put on my best smile and clap for your thoughtful gestures on this special day. But if only you could peek inside my brain, you’d discover what I genuinely desire:
A Team of Pooper Scoopers
Let’s face it, dogs do their business in the yard, and while we have an embarrassing stash of plastic bags from grocery stores, it seems like I’m the only one who ever uses them. Seriously, I’d love to share the responsibility of cleaning up after our furry friends. I’m not a fan of scraping dog poop off the soles of your shoes either!
The Right to Pee in Peace
“Moooooom!” one daughter shrieks, right as I drop my pants. The other one barges in, asking about endangered elephants while I’m trying to handle my business. Why can’t I catch a break?
Someone to Handle Service Calls—for a Year
The never-ending cycle of calls to service providers is exhausting! Whether it’s about the broken vacuum or the noisy fridge, I’d love it if you could take the wheel and handle these calls for the next twelve months. Please!
Socks in the Hamper
No need for explanation here, folks. Just put your dirty socks in the hamper, okay?
Made Beds Without My Help
Your bunk bed is a nightmare! Wrestling with those sheets feels like I’m in a wrestling match with a stubborn opponent. I might just let your bedding sit for weeks at a time because, frankly, it’s a hassle!
Kids Organizing Their Toys
Have you seen the playroom lately? A chaotic mess of toys everywhere! Littlest Pet Shop figurines mixed with LEGO Friends? It’s an overwhelming sight. I dream of a day when you’ll sort and organize your toys without my intervention.
Chilled Champagne
A nice bottle of Veuve Clicquot would be perfect to share with my husband—or hey, even chugging it alone wouldn’t be too bad!
So, hey family! There’s always next year, right? And if you’re looking for more tips on family planning and home insemination, check out this insightful post at Intracervical Insemination. For more information on artificial insemination kits, Make a Mom is a great authority on the subject. And don’t forget to explore Science Daily for some excellent resources on pregnancy.
Summary
This lighthearted piece explores the hidden desires of a mother on Mother’s Day, highlighting her wishes for help with chores, privacy, and a bit of pampering. While she appreciates the thoughtful gestures from her family, she humorously reveals the real gifts she truly craves.