Hey there! I wanted to chat about something that happened recently. You called out to me from the other side of our fence, and honestly, I didn’t recognize you at first since we’ve only had one brief encounter before. You didn’t really introduce yourself or get to know my kids, which is a bummer since we’ve been neighbors for over a year.
During that last chat, you mentioned something about adding mulch to my garden—helpful, I guess? But your next message hit a nerve. You asked me to quiet down my kids because you and your husband wanted to enjoy your wine in peace. I was shocked and quickly brought my kids inside on that lovely May evening, only for them to burst into tears.
In that moment, I felt like I had failed as a mom. I marched back outside, channeling my inner Mama Bear, and told you how hurt they were by your request. You mentioned that when your kids were younger, a simple “shush” was all it took to calm them down. But here’s the thing: my kids are just that—kids. They’re not little adults. They need space to be loud and playful; it’s part of growing up.
You didn’t seem to buy it, and we parted ways with our views still on opposite sides of the fence. After that encounter, I found myself worried about the noise level in our backyard, and my kids started questioning their own behavior. It was a tough few days for all of us.
But as I watched them play, I realized you missed out on some special moments. Here’s a glimpse of what you may have overlooked:
- They spotted a bumblebee making a nest and rushed to tell me, showing empathy despite their fear of bees.
- After ensuring the bee was safe, they happily sang about its life while swinging, even creating a chorus about not picking dandelions to help the bee population.
- My youngest threw a tantrum over candy and eventually worked through her feelings—something I think is important for her growth.
- They turned the swing set into a base for an imaginative game about rescuing whales, with our dog stepping in as a “Bull Shark”—talk about creativity!
- My middle child belted out a song while swinging, finding her voice and her confidence, even if she was off-key.
- They made goodie bags at the picnic table while playing with plastic flutes, adding their own chaotic music to the mix.
We do have some noise rules in our home; I don’t let them outside too early, and if they start fighting or getting too loud, I bring them inside for some quiet time. I respect your space, but I also believe they should have the freedom to play and explore in their own backyard.
When you told them they were being annoying, it hurt their spirits because you were asking them to stop being kids. I get that you want your quiet time, but perhaps it’s worth considering if living in a family-friendly neighborhood is a good fit for you. Childhood is messy, noisy, and wonderfully imperfect, and it doesn’t make me a bad mom. In fact, I want to encourage my kids to embrace their childhood for as long as possible, especially in a world where we face so many challenges.
Thanks for hearing me out! If you want to know more about parenting, check out some excellent resources on fertility and home insemination here or learn more about this topic. And if you’re interested in more insights, feel free to read another one of our blog posts here.
Summary: This piece reflects on a neighbor’s request for quiet from my children while they play outside, emphasizing the joys and importance of childhood freedom. It captures the contrast between adult expectations and the spirited nature of kids, ultimately advocating for a balance in shared spaces.