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Navigating the Journey of Parenting an Average Student
One of the toughest challenges I faced as a parent was coming to terms with my son’s lack of motivation in school. My partner and I tried hard not to let his grades shape our perception of him, especially during his high school years. Nevertheless, those grades did affect how we saw ourselves as parents, leading to moments of doubt and the nagging question: what did we do wrong? In hindsight, it turns out we weren’t responsible for his motivation. That spark had to come from within him.
In today’s world, where AP classes, honor rolls, and perfect GPAs reign supreme, having a child with average grades can feel like a big deal for many parents. Some might even consider it shameful. Many elite colleges often overlook “C” students, making it easy for average performers to feel like they don’t measure up. Even high school counselors and private admissions consultants can dismiss students who aren’t top-tier, pushing them toward junior colleges instead.
But an average high school record doesn’t mean a student can’t succeed in college. My son graduated with a GPA just below 3.0, partly due to a mild learning disability (ADHD) and a general lack of motivation. We tried everything to get him excited about academics, from hiring tutors to seeking help from an inspiring PhD English teacher. Yet, despite her engaging lessons, my son appeared utterly disinterested. As someone who loves reading, it was disheartening to see his indifference toward literature. How would he navigate college-level writing?
On the flip side, my son thrived in sports, impressively recalling baseball and football statistics. He could analyze a football play like a mathematician tackling calculus. We wondered how this knowledge would benefit him academically, yet we recognized the valuable life lessons he gained from playing football—like teamwork and discipline. We supported him in sports, hoping his passion would eventually translate to his studies.
It’s a misconception that attending a prestigious university is the only path to success. Most high school students lack the grades or finances for these elite institutions. Fortunately, there are countless excellent schools that accept average students and provide meaningful educational experiences. My son was lucky to get into one of those universities.
If you’re a parent of an average student, consider taking a different approach than we did. Resist the urge to constantly push them to perform better. Many teens find their motivation after high school. Our constant arguing about his studies only added stress for all of us.
Interestingly, it wasn’t until my son entered college and discovered a passion for American history that he finally earned the grades we knew he was capable of. He graduated in four years, and his senior thesis explored the history of the Mexican baseball league and its influence on the sport in the U.S. He received a B+ on it! Now, he’s juggling two jobs—one in management for a college football team and another in public affairs for a major energy company. He succeeded on his own terms, proving that high school grades don’t define future success.
After all, it’s unlikely that potential employers will ever ask him about his high school GPA. There’s so much more to him than that!
For more insights on this journey, you can check out this excellent resource for pregnancy and home insemination or explore this other blog post that delves into related topics.
Summary
Parenting an average student can be challenging, but it’s essential to recognize that motivation must come from within the child. Emphasizing grades and pressuring them can lead to unnecessary stress. Instead, supporting their passions, as in my son’s case with sports and later academics, can yield surprising results. Finding the right college environment can help students thrive, irrespective of their high school performance.