Who Took My Metabolism? And 15 Other Musings at 39

home insemination Kit

I just hit the big 3-9, and on my birthday, I made it a point to let everyone know that I’m totally chill about turning 40. I might have even flashed some gang signs and declared, “I’m ready to take on 40!” But hey, I also may have created a to-do list of what I want to achieve before I hit the big 4-0, which stressed me out to the point where I needed a nap. Totally possible.

Since turning 39, my mind has been racing with thoughts. Here are some of them:

1. My kids share facts that leave me speechless. I always had an inkling that thunder is the sound of lightning breaking the sound barrier, but when my son told his sister this the other day, I was like, “Of course that’s it!”
2. Oh boy, my skin is in chaos! I’ve consulted dermatologists, visited facialists, and relied on wishful thinking. The verdict? Water is now my best buddy, and those pesky chin zits are the price I pay for indulging in pizza.
3. Recovery isn’t what it used to be. Whether it’s after a workout, too many drinks, or just sitting cross-legged for too long, my body has a lot to say these days, mostly reminding me that I’m not in my prime anymore.
4. Inner peace is my goal, but some days it comes from meditation, while other days it’s just a little alcohol. Yes, Namaste and Two-Buck Chuck!
5. I cherish the moments I can text my mom for her dumpling recipe because one day I won’t have that option.
6. I’ve got no time for fleeting friendships. The friends I connect with now are sticking around for the long haul, whether they like it or not!
7. Sometimes, I just want to sit and do absolutely nothing—just like an 80-year-old man would.
8. I find myself thinking more about mortality—mine, my parents’, and even the older actors I admire.
9. I’m serious about my goals now; it’s truly now or never.
10. The obsession with perfection that haunted me in my 20s? Yeah, not a concern anymore.
11. I genuinely don’t care if someone dislikes me.
12. I’ll sacrifice being polite to stand up for myself now.
13. I’m spending a lot of time encouraging everyone around me to be more self-sufficient. One moment I’m teaching my parents to navigate their gadgets, and the next, I’m convincing my kids that they can grab their own socks.
14. I remember my mom saying she couldn’t imagine life without her kids. I get it now. I look at mine and wonder how I ever lived without knowing them.
15. And that moment I catch my reflection in the mirror some mornings? Yeah, let’s not discuss it.

Time is flying by. Honestly, the only reason I’d want to relive my 20s would be to devour some Ben & Jerry’s without waking up to find it in an unfortunate spot.

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In summary, turning 39 is a wild ride filled with introspection, evolving relationships, and the bittersweet acknowledgment of aging. It’s about embracing the present while planning for the future, all while navigating the chaos of parenting and personal growth.