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To the “Always There” Parent
You find yourself pacing the room, feeling the weight of frustration when your kids refuse to sleep—because honestly, you just need a moment to breathe. You juggle work, bills, and all the endless needs of your little ones, all while someone else drifts in and out of their lives, treating parenting like a casual weekend gig. It stings a bit when your kids are on their best behavior around that other parent, and you hold back your feelings, knowing someone has to be the grown-up. You are the “always there” parent.
Being the one who’s always present comes with its challenges. It’s often a bit tougher and more exasperating for you, but that’s okay. The “always there” parent might not be as entertaining as the “not there” parent. Your arrival isn’t something to look forward to with excitement; you’re simply the steady presence in their lives. And that’s a comforting thought.
Your kids don’t have to worry about performing or acting differently when you’re around. They can be themselves, showing little acts of defiance that tell you they’re not anxious about your presence. They know they can just be kids with you. You’re there.
Sure, being “there” may not seem thrilling or special, but the fact that your kids don’t have to wonder about your consistency is a priceless gift. They don’t waste energy fretting over whether you’ll show up. It doesn’t even cross their minds to act fake around you.
Maybe your entrance doesn’t cause their eyes to light up like a Christmas tree, but that’s because there’s no element of surprise. The “not there” parent can be like a spotlight—bright and fun—but you’re the gentle nightlight that offers quiet comfort. While the spotlight is entertaining, your presence is truly essential.
Being “there” can be a lonely road. You often feel unappreciated, expected to meet demands, and doing it pretty much solo. Yet, the rewards you reap are ones that the “not there” parent may never grasp.
So, to all the single, present parents out there—if you haven’t heard a compliment in days, weeks, or even months, just know you’re doing an amazing job. You are always there for your kids.
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In summary, being the “always there” parent means providing a steady, reliable presence in your children’s lives, even when it feels challenging. Your kids are lucky to have you, and the impact of your love and dedication is immeasurable.