Childhood Confessions: My Barbie Was a Bit Risqué

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You won’t believe my daughter’s reaction when I mentioned playing with Barbies at age 10. She looked at me like I had just spoken a foreign language! Apparently, the idea of her mom indulging in such “childish” activities in the “olden days” was simply unfathomable to her. But, I left out a crucial detail about how I played with those dolls…

Saturday mornings in my childhood home were sacred. We had three main rituals: a bowl of cereal, catching up on cartoons, and then diving into the world of Barbies. After devouring Rice Krispies and enjoying the antics of the Muppet Babies, my sister and I would retreat to our room for hours of imaginative play with those iconic dolls.

Here’s my confession: my Barbie was not exactly the innocent princess she was meant to be—she was more of a floozy. Yep, you read that right. While many saw it as a harmless pastime, I transformed my Barbie adventures into a soap opera that would make anyone blush. Picture this: my Barbie had a pink canopy bed and a dashing Malibu Ken with tan lines. Seriously, my sister’s Ken from the Heart Family series was stuck with plastic underwear, making her playtime a tad less steamy.

To keep things interesting, we often cast our Barbies as real-life characters or favorites from our TV shows. I had a phase where my Barbie and Ken were Eden and Cruz from the soap opera Santa Barbara, while my sister’s Ken frequently morphed into either Ricky Schroder or Joey McIntyre. But most of the time, my Barbie was a reflection of me, with Ken representing my latest crush. And here’s where it gets juicy: my Barbie had a knack for two-timing.

Around the time I became obsessed with The Monkees, I found myself in a dilemma over which Monkee would get my Barbie’s affections. Initially, I thought I had to settle for Davy Jones, the “official” heartthrob, but my heart kept drifting toward Micky Dolenz. I was stuck in a fictional love triangle, and let me tell you, it was just as dramatic as any teen soap opera.

Enter Barbie relationship therapy. I would use my Barbie to express these conflicted feelings about loving two boys at once. Thankfully, my sister had a Rodeo Ken who didn’t get much play due to his awkward design, so my Barbie often found herself officially dating Davy while sneaking around with Micky. Things got a little out of hand, and while I’m not proud of it, I eventually made the right choice and pledged my Barbie’s love to Micky. I think Davy took it pretty hard.

Now, before you think my parents are to blame for my Barbie’s scandalous escapades, let’s set the record straight. They did a fantastic job raising us! Sure, my mom’s love for soap operas might have influenced my imagination, but I also grew up knowing that curiosity didn’t have to dictate my actions. So, while Barbie was out there living her best life, I was more of a goody two-shoes in real life—except for the whole Barbie-and-Ken scenario.

So yes, despite my daughter’s disbelief, I did indeed still play with Barbies at 10. And honestly, maybe it’s for the best that she doesn’t.

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Summary:

As a child, I transformed Barbie playtime into a dramatic soap opera, filled with love triangles and risqué adventures. While my daughter finds it hard to believe I played with Barbies at 10, I confess my Barbie was quite the character. This experience reflects not just childhood innocence but also the complexities of growing up.