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Please Keep Your Parenting Volume in Check
Updated: November 7, 2020
Originally Published: June 16, 2015
Everywhere I look, there are parents: parents with toddlers, parents with teens, and even parents with babies strapped to their chests. This isn’t a cause for concern—it’s summer, and families are out enjoying the sunshine and discovering the world around them. My family is doing the same!
What really gets under my skin, though, is what I like to call the “Extra Loud Parenting Voice.” You could be minding your own business when suddenly, BAM! A parent nearby is broadcasting their entire conversation with their child as if they’re on a loudspeaker. Before you know it, your attention is diverted from your own thoughts or kids, and you’re eavesdropping on their family’s saga.
I’m not sure if this Extra Loud Parenting Voice comes from prolonged exposure to screaming toddlers or just a desire to showcase one’s parenting skills, but it ranks up there with those businessmen gabbing about their latest deals and college students recounting their wild weekends. Honestly, those of us around you are not thinking, “What a wonderful parent!” We’re more like, “Can you please tone it down?”
- In the grocery store: “What color is the orange? Is it orange? Should we buy oranges? Let’s count them. One, two, three, four… Oh, don’t shout, honey. We need to use our inside voices because we are inside. What color are the blueberries? That’s right! Blue! Should we get those?”
- On public transport: “We need to stay seated. Can we color? Here’s your coloring book and crayons. Want some water? No, we can’t play on mommy’s phone. Let’s color this truck. It’s a garbage truck! Look at this truck! Is it a backhoe? Yes! But we can’t look for trucks on my phone!”
- At the playground: “We only go down the slide. It’s not for climbing up. You see how the other kids are using it? That’s not how we do it!”
- At the zoo: “Can you see the giraffe? That’s the daddy giraffe and that’s the baby! Look how long their necks are! Remember the book about giraffes? They eat leaves! No, our dog isn’t a giraffe; he’s a dog! Remember? He says woof woof!”
- At the pool: “Please don’t run! Look at all this water on the ground. It’s slippery! If you go too fast, you could hurt yourself. Mommy doesn’t want you to get hurt. Ice cream? We have to eat lunch first. Remember, veggies with our hummus?”
These are real conversations I’ve had the pleasure of experiencing recently. It’s totally natural to engage your kids and talk to them about their surroundings. However, projecting your voice at such a high volume that everyone around you has to hear it is simply not cool. It’s enough to make anyone wish they could poke their own eyes out!
I’m sure you’re an amazing parent, but I just want to pick out some fresh produce, relax on a bench at the playground, and watch the giraffes in peace. I didn’t come to witness your parenting performance; please leave the Extra Loud Parenting Voice at home!
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Summary:
When out in public, parents often unintentionally turn up their volume while engaging with their kids, creating a phenomenon known as the Extra Loud Parenting Voice. While it’s natural to communicate with children, doing so at a high volume can be disruptive to those around you. Everyone appreciates a peaceful grocery trip, a quiet moment at the playground, or a calm visit to the zoo without the extra noise.