Embracing My Choice: Life Without Children at 43

At 43, I’ve come to terms with my choice not to have kids, and honestly, I don’t feel the slightest bit worried about it. A while back, I had a conversation that left me feeling a bit insulted. Someone asked if I was worried about not having children. Why would I be? Was there something wrong with me? I’ve experienced relationships with more than a few “right” partners, but the idea of marriage was always daunting. I had a brief marriage that lasted six months, and that taught me I didn’t want to go down that road again—thankfully, I didn’t have to learn the same lesson about motherhood.

Childhood Dreams vs. Reality

From a young age, I was sure I didn’t want to be a mom. While other girls played with dolls and imagined family life, I was busy collecting stuffed animals and jamming out to music. I had zero interest in Barbie or Ken—my icons were Prince and Paul Stanley, and trust me, they share a lot of similar traits! Perhaps my upbringing played a part; nurturing wasn’t really a thing in my household. Still, I remember dressing my dog in baby clothes and having him sit in a high chair, probably leading everyone to think I was just your average girl who wanted kids. Nope! Just dogs—lots of them.

Society’s Expectations

What really irks me is how society defines “normal” for women based on motherhood. When do we ever ask men if they want kids? Instead, we focus on their aspirations and achievements. Women have goals too, whether they’re mothers or not. And just to clarify, being a mother is absolutely an incredible achievement, but those of us who choose not to have children shouldn’t be labeled as deficient or incomplete.

Finding My Own Path

So here I am at 43, still without that intense urge to procreate. Instead, I’m focused on leaving behind a legacy of art, books, and creativity. Does that make me weird? Am I somehow off-balance? Nah, I think it just means I’m being true to myself, like many women are today, despite society’s attempts to shame us for our choices. Not every woman wants kids, and that’s totally okay. Some of us hear that biological clock ticking, and we just choose to throw it against the wall! For me, there’s been no ticking or alarm—just a peaceful space where I can thrive.

Resources for Your Journey

If you’re exploring your own journey in this area, check out some excellent resources like this one on pregnancy or visit this blog post for more insights on home insemination. And if you’re navigating the journey of artificial insemination, Make a Mom is a great place to start.

In Conclusion

In summary, it’s perfectly normal for women to choose not to have children, and it doesn’t define our worth or happiness. Embrace your choices, and know that you’re not alone in your journey.