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How I’m Navigating My Mid-30s Journey
By: Mia Thompson
Last month, on a sunny Tuesday afternoon, I found myself hauling cupcakes, party hats, and juice boxes to my daughter Lily’s classroom for her sixth birthday celebration. Without a second car at my disposal, I loaded everything into a rickety old wagon, huffing and puffing as I maneuvered over the bumpy sidewalks, grumbling about a missing screw in the handle. When we walked home together, with what I would later discover was pink frosting smeared across my shirt, I asked her if she enjoyed her special day. Her reply, as she bounded over a crack in the pavement, lit up my heart: “It was the best birthday ever, Mama! Because you were there!” She reached for my hand, and in that moment, I felt a wave of love and gratitude wash over me, reminding me why I left my full-time role as an academic dean nearly a year ago to freelance and spend more time with my girls.
Transitioning to this new chapter hasn’t been without its challenges. The hustle and bustle of maintaining a career while trying to be the parent I envisioned was exhausting, and eventually, something had to give. Now my days are filled with precious moments and the sweet sound of little hands reaching for me, but working from home has its own set of unexpected tensions. Gradually, I’ve embraced this new role, discovering a resilience and adaptability I didn’t know I had.
In the past, I found it difficult to carve out my identity at home without the external validation I had grown accustomed to in my professional life. In my 20s, I pictured myself in a world of intellectual pursuits, not on the floor playing Simon Says. While I left my job to be more present for my loved ones, I often struggled to fill my time with meaningful activities rather than just ticking off to-do lists. Financial discussions with my partner revealed deeper issues of power and independence that needed reevaluating.
Despite spending my days writing and applying for jobs I didn’t truly want, I often felt frustrated and disconnected. I’d be staring at my laptop while my daughter played at my feet, missing out on the simple joys of life. A year later, I realized I had the freedom to engage fully with my children—watching them build with blocks or hearing their stories from school, finally like I had envisioned during my time at home. My work life had shifted, but I hadn’t fully adjusted to this new reality.
I once believed that my mid-30s would be a time of clarity, a straight path leading toward stability and maturity. Instead, I’ve learned to accept that life is a winding road, often unpredictable. Maturity for me now means allowing myself to grow and adapt as life unfolds. I’m not so much racing down a predetermined track anymore but rather reshaping my journey daily, addressing the myriad of responsibilities I couldn’t have anticipated a decade ago—caring for young kids, aging parents, managing finances, and nurturing my marriage.
Life has a way of throwing curveballs that change the narrative. My story is constantly evolving, and I’m learning to embrace the present instead of clinging to past plans. In this season of my life, I’m choosing to follow the path that feels true to me, letting go of what I think I should be doing, and focusing on nurturing the relationships I value most.
I make it a point to call my grandmother more often, cherishing the undivided time we share. In my mid-30s, I’m reconnecting with my mom, not in opposition but as allies. I reach out to friends, write letters, and watch Lily light up with excitement on her school trips, grateful that I can be there to share these moments. My husband and I have open conversations about our evolving lives, recognizing that sometimes we have to reinvent ourselves to accommodate each other.
This path will continue to shift, as life invariably does. For now, I steal moments to write and cultivate the world through my thoughts and experiences with my children. I navigate the bumps in the road with that old wagon, living in the moment when their little hands fit perfectly in mine, savoring the hugs that feel bigger than life itself because, like everything, this phase will pass.
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Summary:
In my mid-30s, I’m redefining my path, embracing the joys and challenges of parenting while letting go of past expectations. I focus on relationships and savoring the present, allowing life to unfold in unexpected yet rewarding ways.