Feeling my age is an understatement as I embrace my 39th year. Age is a complex concept, but for me, this year feels like a real milestone. Back in the day, the big birthdays were 13, 16, 18, and 21. I thought 25 would be the last of the significant ones, marking my arrival into adulthood as I could finally rent a car. Yet here I am, standing at the threshold of 39, and it feels even more pivotal—perhaps even more than what 40 will bring.
Reflections on Life and Music
At 39, you might splurge on tickets to see your favorite artist, realizing your love for them is borderline obsessive—yes, even if their hair was a disaster in the ’90s. And when you hear a tribute to an old-school jam that you adore, it might just fill you with more joy than their latest hits.
You do your holiday shopping online, not out of tech savvy, but simply because you can’t stand the chaos of crowded malls and time is always a luxury. (I once rang in the New Year in Times Square and attended Woodstock ’94—when did I become such a busy homebody?)
Health and Aging
Cancer touches the lives of too many people around you, igniting feelings of anger and fear. You start to scrutinize your skin, peering in the mirror and pondering what’s happening with that little bump on your forehead.
Conversations with your college friends now revolve around the best devices to remove unwanted hair and which yoga pants are most comfortable for school drop-offs. Because, you know, that’s what’s hot these days.
Nostalgia and Change
Your partner remarks that someone like Taylor Swift would be an awesome daughter. You catch yourself keeping the car running just to hear a Guns N’ Roses song on the radio—on the easy listening station, no less—because it brings back those college memories. And Hall and Oates? They transport you to family road trips, while Paul Simon and Billy Joel fill the soundtrack of your childhood.
Tears come easily now, whether from commercials or YouTube videos. You avoid violent films and are bewildered by the fashion choices of teenagers today. The realization hits you that while you once resonated with Carrie from “Sex and the City,” she now feels young and distant—like someone you wouldn’t hang out with anymore.
Life’s Contrasts
Hearing about friends going through separations and divorces contrasts starkly with the weekends filled with weddings from your earlier years. It feels surreal, as if divorce is the ultimate grown-up move. It’s alarming, like a storm that could strike at any moment, even though we know it’s not random at all.
Lunches are spent discussing everything from memory care facilities for your parents to the latest preschools for your kids. Everyone you know seems to be training for a race, whether it’s a marathon or an Ironman. Meanwhile, you might find yourself enjoying a Diet Coke with your kale salad. Details, right?
The Realities of Adulthood
Speaking of drinks, hangovers are now a real concern. One too many drinks can turn into a gamble on how miserable tomorrow will be. Squinting is becoming more common, and you start seeing kitchen appliances as potential gifts. You don’t recognize any of the bands on New Year’s Eve anymore, but you can still beat your kids at Just Dance (just that game, mind you), which brings a strangely satisfying grin to your face, even if you’re sore the next day.
You may wonder what happened to celebrities from your youth like Winona Ryder and Natalie Merchant, hoping they are doing okay. You’ll always have a soft spot for Ethan Hawke and John Cusack, like nostalgic neighbors from your past. And Jake Ryan? He’ll always be the ultimate crush, no matter what he looks like now.
Stepping into Leadership
Your parents are starting to slow down, and some friends are losing theirs. It’s a stark reminder that it’s our generation that’s stepping into leadership roles in society. The same folks you partied with in your college days are now running universities and corporations. It’s mind-boggling, making me feel like a teenager in adult clothing. But I’m ready to embrace responsibility, speak up for my beliefs, and accept that I won’t please everyone. I know I’m imperfect, and that’s okay.
Comfort Over Style
So, I’m all about comfort over style now—ballet flats over heels—and I’ve come to terms with ditching Spanx for good. I realize I’m the only mom my kids will have, so I need to treat myself well and show them that despite my flaws, I’m valuable. One day, they’ll also be imperfect yet valuable 39-year-olds.
Looking Ahead
I won’t lie; the thought of turning 40 is a little intimidating, but in a way that’s exciting and filled with possibilities. If this is what 39 feels like, I can’t wait to see what my 40s have in store, as long as I figure out what’s going on with that spot above my lip.
For more insights on this journey, check out this blog post. And if you’re looking to learn about home insemination, Cryobaby is a great resource, as well as Progyny, which offers excellent information on pregnancy and home insemination.
In Summary
Turning 39 brings a mix of nostalgia, responsibilities, and reflections on life. It’s a unique time of transition, where the past meets the inevitability of growing up, while also embracing the excitement of what’s to come.