Why Kids Playing With Toy Guns Is Completely Okay

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Hey there! So, my little buddy, Ben, who’s just five, has recently entered this phase where he’s all about toy guns. At first, I wasn’t sure how to deal with it, especially since some of his friends’ parents have also been scratching their heads over how our usually sweet kids are suddenly pretending to be action heroes, shooting each other from behind couches and zooming down the hall with bananas as their weapons. It’s like a mini version of an action flick!

From the kitchen, we listen to the chaos and can’t help but cringe a little. On one hand, hearing a tiny voice begging for mercy in a scene inspired by Frozen isn’t exactly comforting. But then again, pretending to play with guns is something many kids have done over the years. It feels like a typical part of growing up. And honestly, trying to regulate pretend play is tricky business! For example, Ben loves to use water guns in the summer, but when I stopped him from pretending to shoot his brother, he just said, “I’m pretending to squirt him.” Touché, kiddo!

I’ve been a bit uneasy about how to approach this whole pretend gun thing. We’ve set one firm rule: if a child feels scared during play, that playtime has to stop. But I still wonder, am I somehow promoting violence by letting it continue?

Today, I stumbled upon an article by a science writer named Clara Thompson titled “It’s Okay for Kids to Play With Toy Guns.” She dives into recent findings about children and their playful combat. Turns out, this type of play is totally normal and can actually help kids manage their aggressive feelings. She notes that in a study from 2013, researchers found that preschoolers who engaged in more pretend violence—like having stuffed animals bite each other—tended to exhibit less aggression in real-life situations. The idea is that when kids include violence in their make-believe games, they might learn to better control their actual violent impulses and handle their emotions.

Clara does mention that some kids might naturally be more aggressive, and if one child is genuinely hurting others during play, that’s definitely a red flag. Also, mindless violence, like repeatedly smashing a doll without any story, isn’t great either.

In fact, some psychologists have warned that stopping kids from acting out these impulses might be counterproductive. Clara points out a study that suggests preventing children from engaging in play fighting could hinder their social and emotional development. While it’s not clear if this is a direct cause-and-effect situation, it’s essential to recognize that pretend aggression is not the same as real-life aggression, according to child psychologist Lisa Hart.

So, I can breathe a little easier about all the toy gun action and shift my focus to the real issue—actual guns. Clara highlights that real firearms are the second-leading cause of death for kids aged 1 to 19 in the U.S. Instead of worrying about toy guns, we should be more concerned about the dangers of real ones.

To sum it all up, kids playing with pretend guns is a normal and healthy part of childhood development. It allows them to explore and manage their emotions. As parents, our attention might be better spent on discussing the seriousness of real firearms instead.

If you’re interested in more parenting insights, check out this other blog post about home insemination kits.