Hey there! So, let me tell you about my life with my very hairy husband, Jake. When we first crossed paths, I was immediately struck by his towering height—definitely eye-catching. Then, there was that cute backside, and, of course, the hair situation. I find it rather charming, though I was puzzled to see his arms were oddly smooth. It turned out Jake had been on a shaving kick for his forearms, thanks to some misguided advice from a past girlfriend. My first mission as his girlfriend? Put an end to that nonsense.
I’m a fan of a bit of hairiness; it feels rugged and manly. Honestly, there’s something exhilarating about being swept off my feet by a hairy dude who looks like he could wrestle a bear. Plus, I find his warmth rather comforting—yes, I know it sounds weird, but it’s true.
However, sharing space with a furry fella comes with its quirks. For instance, I never realized belly button lint was a real phenomenon until I met Jake. He tends to collect quite a bit of it, often tossing it to the floor like it’s confetti. Our kids are usually shocked when they spot it, exclaiming, “WHAT IS THAT THING?!” as I calmly reassure them, “Just another clump of Daddy’s belly button lint.”
And don’t even get me started on the hair that mysteriously attaches itself to our little ones after they’ve had a snooze on his chest. I often find myself thinking, “It’s not his fault; he’s just a hairy guy. Maybe the full moon is to blame?!” I mean, I shed my own long, blonde hairs all over the place, so I guess we’re all in this together.
Then there are the occasional manscaping mishaps. Thankfully, they don’t happen often, but when they do, wow, they are something to behold. The other day, I was busy typing away in our office when Jake popped his head in, shirtless as usual. He looked a bit sheepish and said, “I need your help.” I raised an eyebrow and listened as he explained, “I was shaving my head and neck, and the razor slipped…”
When he turned around, I nearly gasped. It looked like he had a faux off-the-shoulder shirt made entirely of hair. I was at a loss for words. Fixing that would require a full-body shave—all or nothing!
If I were to write a book called “Living with a Hairy Partner,” it would be the briefest read ever: “Don’t negotiate. Just shave him down ASAP.” And that’s all you’d need to know!
By the way, if you’re curious about home insemination, check out this post on intracervical insemination. And for more expert insights, visit Make a Mom. You can also refer to UCSF’s Center for excellent resources on pregnancy and home insemination!
Summary
Living with a hairy partner can be a wild adventure filled with unexpected moments, from belly button lint to manscaping dramas. Embracing the quirks while maintaining a sense of humor is key to enjoying this unique relationship.