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8 Stages of Experiencing a Hangover as a Parent

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  1. Realization
    You slowly become aware that your body is in a state of disarray, battling dehydration and sleep deprivation. Your eyelids are still glued shut, and you start to mentally assess the situation. Head throbbing? Check. Nausea? Oh no, this might be a long-haul hangover. Why didn’t I book the babysitter for the night? Did I really attempt the Macarena with the kids next door? Oh boy, the headache is intensifying.
  2. Concealment
    Eventually, you hear little feet scuttling outside your bedroom door. There’s some whispering going on. Oh no, what are they plotting now? Grab those crayons and color on my walls, just stay out of my room for a bit longer! Please, dear universe, give me a few more moments of peace.
  3. Bargaining
    If you think hard enough, maybe you can negotiate with your partner before the kids bust in demanding your attention. I vaguely remember a romantic encounter with Alex last night (let’s hope that was after the sitter left!). So, darling husband, who remains blissfully asleep, you’re taking the reins this morning!
  4. Courage
    The sound of your youngest wailing and the scent of burnt pancakes finally drag you out of bed. Alright, it’s not too terrible—just a bit dizzy. A quick trip downstairs for some soda and half a cup of coffee, and suddenly it’s the Morning Show with Mom (who’s still rocking last night’s makeup and probably a bit tipsy). Here comes Fun Mom! Silly Mom! I can totally handle this!
  5. Second Breakdown
    Without warning, Fun Mom feels like she’s about to crumble right there in the kitchen, and the only remedy is her bed. But there’s a soccer match, a birthday party, and a meal for a new mom to prepare. The only pain relief in the house is for kids aged 0 to 12, and the lone Alka-Seltzer in the drawer is brown and definitely not fizzy.
  6. Thankfulness and Regret
    These two feelings often collide for the hungover parent. You can’t help but reflect on your reckless choices. What if there had been an emergency? (Surely Alex would wake up for that, right?!) Or how I wasted a precious day of my kids’ childhood! But then, there’s gratitude for your partner, who may not have been the most helpful during sleepless nights but is now right there for Hungover Mom.
  7. Near Sleep
    Finally, sweet sleep beckons. By the day’s end, Hungover Mom is utterly drained. After chugging a gallon of water, taking some Advil (thanks, Alex!), and enjoying a refreshing shower, is there anything better than crawling back into bed?
  8. Commitment
    I swear, this will never happen again. It’s completely not worth it (fade to black)…

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This article was first published on July 9, 2015, and if you’re interested in more parenting insights, check out our other blog posts here, including this one.

Summary: Navigating hangovers as a parent is a rollercoaster ride of realization, negotiation, and moments of bravery. From the initial wake-up call to the sweet relief of bedtime, every stage is filled with humor and a touch of regret. Ultimately, it’s a commitment to never repeat the experience, all while juggling the joys and challenges of parenting.

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