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Navigating My Midlife Awakening
This past November, I hit the big 46. Honestly, I felt a bit out of sorts—flabby, scatterbrained, and just kind of blah. One night, I woke up in a panic at 1:24 a.m., convinced I could hear someone downstairs playing the same piano note over and over. My hair was misbehaving, and I seemed to have misplaced my sense of humor. For the first time, I truly felt like an adult, and let me tell you, I wasn’t thrilled about it.
Fast forward to my birthday. I woke up to my kids and husband singing to me, showering me with gifts and hugs. What a lovely way to kick off 46! I spent the day in true 2015 style—scrolling through Facebook. I received a flood of well-wishes from friends, family, and even some coworkers I had accidentally accepted as friends. It was like my past had come back to say hello in a chorus of cheerful messages.
Oddly enough, I didn’t feel burdened by the years or the time that had passed. Instead, it was all about abundance—more people in my life, more memories, more love. It struck me that “Time has given me space to accommodate more of everything in my life.” For the first time, I understood that old saying, “I’m not old, I’m just experienced.”
Along with the messages, there were some nostalgic photos. Three stood out to me. My sister shared a baby picture of me gazing longingly at a pastry shop. Turns out my obsession with sweets started early! An old friend posted a page from a notebook where I had written a poem—my first writing gig! While I didn’t recall the moment, I still remember the poem by heart. And then there was the picture from my 26th birthday dinner, which made me realize how much I had changed. I looked vibrant, carefree, and full of life. My husband remarked, “That’s how you looked when we met!” and my daughter chimed in, “Mommy, you were so pretty back then!” My son, on the other hand, stared at the picture and asked, “Who is that?”
As the years zipped by, I realized how far I had come in two decades. Yet, when I looked in the mirror on my 46th birthday, I wasn’t pleased with the reflection staring back at me. I decided I wouldn’t accept just aging gracefully. The day after my birthday, while juggling work, kids, and daily chores, I nearly forgot my resolution. But something inside me didn’t let it slip away. Over the next few months, I quietly took steps to embrace that resolution.
I reached out to friends who truly mattered and let go of those whose negative opinions didn’t faze me. I stopped checking Facebook every hour and started prioritizing quality time with my family. I read more, snacked less, and even prepped for a spring garden. We jumped on the bed, searched for sea glass, and got messy with fun science experiments. Laughter filled the house, and I found myself smiling more.
Now, almost three months post-birthday, I woke up, grabbed my book, hit the gym, had a sensible breakfast, styled my newly permed hair, and donned my favorite ripped jeans and worn-out shoes. Looking in the mirror, I saw echoes of my 26-year-old self. Sure, I’ve got some bags under my eyes and still need to shed that baby weight (yes, he’s 8 now!), but I also feel more confident and fulfilled than ever. Quite the trade-off, right?
So, if you find yourself facing a midlife crisis, my advice? Pick an age—any age—and reflect on what made you your best self at that time. It’s still you; you may just need to dig a little to uncover that version. That buried treasure of your best midlife self might just be waiting for you to find it.
And if you’re looking for more on self-empowerment or even parenting tips, check out our post on home insemination here, or for expert advice, visit Make A Mom. Additionally, for pregnancy and home insemination resources, Cleveland Clinic has some excellent information.
In summary, embracing midlife can mean rediscovering the best parts of yourself. It’s all about reconnecting with who you are and what you love, and sometimes, that journey can lead to unexpected treasures.