Don’t Forget Yourself While Being a Parent

home insemination Kit

Hey there, fellow parents! We all know that juggling multiple roles can be a wild ride, and let’s be honest, we wear those hats pretty well. When my twins arrived three years ago, I stepped into the “mom” role, and honestly, it felt like the best title ever—though it’s a cap that rarely comes off.

For a long time, my world revolved solely around my boys. I had friends, sure, but they were mostly seen through the screen of my phone. I barely managed to keep up with text messages. As a stay-at-home mom, my week was filled with activities like women’s bible study and exciting outings to the zoo or library with my little ones. I was always by their side—literally.

And you know what? I loved it. My boys were my everything.

But then life threw me a curveball—I went back to work full-time. Suddenly, I was grappling with this intense mom guilt, feeling like I was abandoning my kids for 45 hours a week. It felt as though I was leaving them in the hands of strangers, and I worried about the emotional toll it might take on them. Their father was mostly absent, and I feared I was just adding to the chaos by working.

Then there’s the financial burden of childcare. Paying someone else to watch my kids while I worked felt like a cruel twist of fate. The thought of it was hard to swallow, so I limited my outings to work and church, making sure my time with them was as present as possible. But let’s be real—that’s tough.

Eventually, the stress started to wear on me. I was feeling resentful and not the mom I wanted to be after long days at work. As my boys grew older and I adjusted to this new life, I realized the importance of carving out some time for myself. People would often say, “You need some ‘me time,’” and while I appreciated the sentiment, it felt impractical.

However, I’ve come to understand that taking time away from my kids is essential not just for me but also for them. We pour everything into our children, but if we don’t take care of ourselves, we end up feeling drained and depleted. Just like a bank account, you can’t keep making withdrawals without putting something back in.

It’s a simple truth: “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.” We need to nurture ourselves. Before we were parents, we had lives of our own. We had friends, hobbies, and adult conversations—not just diaper duty and snack time.

As much as I cherish my time with my boys, I’ve discovered that I’m a better mom when I take breaks and indulge in a bit of fun that doesn’t involve them. Yes, being “mom” is incredible, but I also need to reconnect with who I am—let’s call her Sam.

It’s been a journey finding Sam again after feeling lost in the chaos of parenthood. My kids were my refuge during tough times, but as they grow, I realize I need to find other sources of joy too.

It’s easy to lose ourselves in parenting, and many couples face challenges after kids come along. Our children need us to be whole individuals, not just their caregivers. If we lose ourselves, can we truly be there for them?

If you’re figuring out this balance, don’t hesitate to check out some helpful resources on pregnancy and parenting, like this excellent page on pregnancy. And for those curious about home insemination, here’s a great at-home insemination kit that can help you in your journey. If you want to chat, feel free to reach out through this link for more info!

Summary

Finding balance in parenthood is crucial. While being a dedicated parent is rewarding, it’s equally important to prioritize self-care and personal identity outside of parenting. Taking time for yourself can enhance your relationship with your children and improve your overall well-being.