So, my eldest just kicked off 2nd grade today. I was up bright and early at 5:30 a.m., a whole hour before my alarm, wide awake and buzzing like it was Christmas morning.
I made all the classic mom moves for this big day. I whipped up some pancakes from that instant mix you just add water to (yes, I shook that bottle like a pro). I even made sure to throw on a bra—no way was I giving the neighbors a show while shaking that pancake batter.
I laid out Liam’s navy shorts and told him to ignore the lint all over them (lesson learned: don’t wash them with new towels). Double-knotted his sneakers too because, you know, that’s important.
We missed the bus, but I assured him there was still time to make it through the carpool line. I rounded up his little siblings, still in their pajamas, and loaded them all into the van.
Liam has been adamant about wanting to be an “astrobiologist” for months now. Just last year, it was regular scientist. It’s a big leap, and I found myself Googling “astrobiologist” before I even had my coffee this morning—talk about a wake-up call.
As we sat in the long line of cars at the school, I decided to try for a heartfelt moment with Liam. You know that moment—when you look into your child’s eyes and feel that deep connection, only to snap back to reality when you find yourself yelling, “DON’T EAT THE TOOTHPASTE OUT OF THE SINK!” yet again.
I turned in my seat, fighting back tears of pride. “Liam, I’m so proud of you, and I hope you have an amazing day. Your siblings are really going to miss you tod—”
And at that exact moment, the teacher in charge of carpool opened the van door, and Liam shouted, “BYE, SUCKERS!!!” at the top of his lungs as he jumped out.
The teacher stood there for a second, completely frozen. I just smiled and yelled, “HAVE A GREAT DAY!” acting like it was the most normal thing ever, as if the Lee family does this every day. Her face didn’t budge as she closed the door.
Next time, I’m going to roll down the window of our old van, blow them kisses, and shout “BYE, SUCKERS!!!” as I drive off. Because that’s how we roll, SUCKERS!
For more parenting laughs and relatable moments, check out other posts on our blog, like this one about privacy policies. And if you’re looking for info on male fertility, this site is a great resource. Plus, if you want to dive deeper into female infertility, this support group is worth a look.
In summary, the first day of school can be a rollercoaster of emotions, especially when your child decides to express themselves a bit too loudly. Embrace the chaos and remember, it’s all part of the journey.