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Almost 40 Doesn’t Mean Almost Done
Hey there! So, I just hit 38, and you’d think I’ve got everything figured out. I’ve got a college degree, a wonderful partner, and four amazing kids. I own a home, have a decent job, and a great circle of friends. On the surface, life looks pretty good. But deep down, I often feel like I’m falling short, and here’s why.
This morning, while at the gym, I met a gorgeous, fit young woman. Our coach thought it’d be fun to ask her about her encounter with a celebrity. I couldn’t hear her story clearly because my inner voice was yelling, “What have you achieved?”
There was a time when I was in her shoes—20 years old, living it up in Los Angeles, finishing my theater degree, and juggling waitressing and acting gigs. I even bumped into Jim Carrey once! No proof, just a cool story. Now, I was stuck trying to impress a 20-something, and instead, I felt like a has-been. Ouch.
I knew the inevitable question was coming: “Do you still act?” I gave my usual spiel about moving back to the Midwest after meeting my husband, how we had kids, and how I ended up in a university job that doesn’t use my theater degree but helps pay for my children’s college. So, nope, I’m not acting anymore—not unless local commercials count, which they don’t.
She smiled politely and scooted away, probably to avoid my midlife crisis.
As I worked out, I started questioning my life choices. I used to set goals for myself, and aside from winning an Oscar (which I sort of did when I named my fourth son Oscar), I met most of them. I wanted a loving partner, financial independence, a home, and even to meet Oprah. I wasn’t very specific about where I’d be. But most importantly, I aimed to be happy.
We all know that college kids are often clueless about their future. I set broad goals, and to my credit, I hit them, even the Oprah one. The difference now? I’ve been focused on my kids’ goals instead of my own.
And that’s why I feel stuck.
Without personal goals, I’m just coasting through life. My kids can set their own paths. As I near 40, it’s time for me to prioritize my own aspirations—starting with the realization that comparing myself to someone half my age is pointless. I mean, let’s be real, I’d totally outshine her!
But in all honesty, there’s so much potential ahead of me that my younger self couldn’t even dream of. Many incredible women thrive after 40, and I’m ready to be one of them.
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Summary
Turning 40 doesn’t mean your dreams are over; it can be a fresh start. The author reflects on life goals, the importance of self-aspiration, and the potential for growth beyond the age of 40.