Your cart is currently empty!
Anti-Angst: Not All Teens Are Terrible
In my years as a mom, one piece of unsolicited advice I’ve received repeatedly is to “just wait.” Friends with tweens and teens often watched me having a blast with my young kids and warned, “They’re so sweet now, just wait.” They’d reminisce about the universal teenage behaviors that I, too, had once exhibited. “Just wait until they…” start talking back… hide their grades… tell little white lies… slam doors… or even call you the worst mom ever. The thought of my kids becoming unmanageable was unsettling, especially since I had my rebellious moments (and my husband, according to his mother, was once the reigning King of Teenage Trouble).
As my kids grew and showed no signs of turning into rebellious teens, the warnings only intensified. The most vocal parents often had challenging teens and they would caution me from the rooftops about my well-adjusted kids. “Just you wait! Once they hit middle school, they’ll… sneak out… get suspended… try drugs… get arrested… insist on wearing thongs… do what?!”
It felt like these parents were hoping to normalize their kids’ misbehavior so they wouldn’t feel so isolated or guilty. But really, my heart went out to their children. How could teens make sound choices when their parents anticipated failure? What self-esteem could they have knowing their parents shared their mistakes as cautionary tales on social media?
I refused to accept that some magical age would turn my kids into monsters. I was tired of being told to expect the worst based on the experiences of others. Not all kids are the same.
For example, my teens haven’t morphed into wild, drug-fueled troublemakers. I wish people would stop trying to make me feel like the worst is looming and that if it doesn’t happen, there’s something wrong with my children. I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve heard parents say, “I’d rather my kid be a bully than a socially awkward nerd.” One does not define the other.
Let’s stop perpetuating the stereotype that all teens must be angsty and uncommunicative. Parents shouldn’t be holding their breath, waiting for the storm to hit, and we shouldn’t embed these negative ideas into our kids’ minds. Teens should know it’s perfectly normal to have a great relationship with their parents. And we should embrace the fact that being a parent doesn’t mean we can’t also be friends with our kids.
I’m done waiting for the worst. I choose to be kind, open, and honest with my teens, and they’ve responded positively. I respect them, offer sound advice, and guide them when they’re about to make mistakes. I genuinely laugh at their jokes and listen to their sometimes convoluted stories about friends and life. I support their dreams and keep their secrets.
They’ve been my little buddies since day one, and no matter what challenges lie ahead, I believe we’ll stay close for life. Just you wait.
For more insights on parenting and family dynamics, check out this post on home insemination techniques. Additionally, if you’re interested in learning more about at-home insemination options, Cryobaby’s kits are an excellent resource. And for those navigating the complexities of fertility insurance, this site offers valuable information.
Summary
Parenting teens doesn’t have to be a nightmare. By fostering open communication and healthy relationships, parents can create a positive environment that counters the stereotype of rebellious teenagers. It’s essential to believe in your kids and encourage good choices rather than waiting for misbehavior to occur.