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Why We Chose to Medicate Our ADD Son
(Note: I sought my son’s approval before sharing this story.)
There’s a growing trend in the diagnosis of Attention Deficit Disorder/Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADD/ADHD) for various non-medical reasons. Many parents report that schools encourage them to seek diagnoses to improve test scores, while others feel that pharmaceutical companies are pushing doctors to prescribe medications to children who are simply a bit restless or unruly. Diet, particularly sugar, has also been considered a potential culprit, although recent studies suggest that food additives and sugar may not be as problematic as previously thought. Regardless of these theories, there are certainly children with genuine ADD/ADHD who require medication to cope with their challenges. Unfortunately, parents of such children often face criticism and blame for their kids’ learning difficulties.
My son, Alex, received his ADD diagnosis at the age of 8 after his teacher raised concerns. While his father and I had hoped his struggles stemmed from immaturity, it became clear that he was a distractible, fidgety child who found calmness only in front of screens—whether it be television or video games, a common trait among ADD kids. His intelligence was overshadowed by his ADD, and his academic performance was below what we all anticipated. We implemented a 504 Plan to provide him with additional support, but getting teachers to adhere to it was often an uphill battle. At times, I had to channel my inner mama bear to ensure Alex received the assistance he deserved.
No parent relishes the idea of medicating their child. Deciding to start Alex on medication was a difficult choice, but witnessing the positive impact it had on him was a huge relief. Contrary to popular belief, the medication didn’t work like magic; it didn’t instantly transform him from a distracted student into a focused achiever. While it certainly helped, it was a long journey of dedicated parenting and Alex’s personal growth that ultimately allowed him to thrive—medicated or not.
Managing his medication was a challenge throughout his childhood and teenage years. There were times when he was overmedicated, leaving him feeling zombie-like, and we would adjust his dosage down. As he matured and grew taller, we found ourselves needing to recalibrate his dosage again. We made a significant error during his junior year of high school when we consulted a new psychiatrist (who came highly recommended) who drastically reduced his medication by nearly 80 percent. This led to a decline in both his grades and behavior that year, and I still regret that decision. Why wait so long to correct it? We didn’t trust our instincts, and it was a hard lesson to learn.
I am confident that Alex’s ADD diagnosis was accurate. Was his diet flawless? No. Were we as strict as we could have been? Maybe not. But it wasn’t simply a matter of behavior modification; it was as if his entire being found a sense of calm when he took his medication. Would it have been wiser to forgo medication and let him remain fidgety and distracted? Should I have tried eliminating sugar, preservatives, and junk food for months to see what might have helped? We chose not to risk his happiness and well-being by prolonging his struggles.
Ultimately, what made the biggest difference for Alex was maturation. Some might argue that patience would have led him to outgrow his ADD, but that’s not the case. Now at 21, nearing college graduation, he has learned to manage his ADD and knows when he needs to take his medication—mostly for school—and when he can skip it. He regularly meets with a mental health specialist for his prescription rather than an internist, as many do. He’s become a diligent student who utilizes his university’s support system to ensure his success. Whether he will continue to need medication as an adult is uncertain, but the choice is now his.
To those who claim ADD/ADHD aren’t legitimate disorders, blaming lazy parenting, undisciplined children, or external factors like fast food or video games, I would say this: Imagine your child had a health issue—like asthma or allergies—and you had the option to medicate or wait it out to see if dietary changes would help. Wouldn’t you want to give your child the best chance at health, happiness, and success? Why would you want to experiment on them when a treatable condition disrupts their life? We didn’t.
For more insights on parenting and health choices, check out this post on home insemination kits, or visit Make a Mom for expert advice. Additionally, the ASRM offers fantastic resources for pregnancy and home insemination.
Summary:
In this personal account, Jenna shares her journey with her son Alex’s ADD diagnosis, highlighting the challenges and decisions surrounding his medication. She discusses the stigma faced by parents and the misconceptions about ADD/ADHD while emphasizing the importance of proper diagnosis and treatment. Ultimately, Jenna reflects on the growth and maturity that have helped Alex navigate his condition, leaving the decision of medication in his hands as he enters adulthood.