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Narcoleptics and Busy Moms Deserve Love Too
Updated: Sep. 7, 2015
Originally Published: Sep. 7, 2015
I suspect my partner has narcolepsy. His ability to fall asleep the moment he relaxes is both fascinating and frustrating. This so-called narcolepsy isn’t just a minor annoyance in our relationship; sometimes I feel like shaking him out of his stupor with my weary, irritable hands. While I struggle to drift off, I’m often jolted awake by either his snoring or the kids.
Just the other day, while chatting with some friends, I accidentally said, “I think my husband has necrophilia.” Clearly, I’m in dire need of more sleep.
I adore my husband. I want to spend quality time with him, even share intimate moments. But our little ones seem to be everywhere, disrupting conversations and our private time, squeezing their tiny bodies between us. The changes that parenthood has brought can feel overwhelming, and keeping our relationship healthy can be a challenge.
Some days, I just want to yell, “I’m done!” and take a pair of scissors to a gallon of milk, letting it splatter all over the kitchen floor, just to leave a chaotic scene for him when he gets home. Then, I’d greet him with a kiss and say, “I didn’t do anything today except create a milk disaster. Oh, and the kids have all got tummy troubles. We’re out of diapers, bread, and milk—obviously. See you in a week!”
Recently, I expressed that my emotional needs weren’t being met, and before I knew it, I found myself having a heartfelt conversation before 8 a.m. Picture this: me in my pajamas, angrily unloading the dishwasher, while he stands there in his work clothes, looking utterly bewildered. Meanwhile, our kids are in the bathroom trying to shove balloons down the drain. Ah, the joys of marriage and parenting!
I often reminisce about the days when we were still trying to impress each other. Back then, I would spend hours getting ready, and he would surprise me with flowers or tickets to a show. But now, adulting has taken over—budgeting, school supplies, and debates about that mysterious smell in the van that’s lingered for weeks. It didn’t seem romantic at all.
Or at least, that’s what I thought.
One Tuesday evening at 5:45, I stood at the sink wondering, “Who on earth invented Hamburger Helper? It’s just a box of chemicals I’m supposed to mix with meat and water. Why are the boys screaming? Oh no, someone’s going to end up in the ER—STOP RUNNING THROUGH THE HOUSE!!—Oh, Robbie’s home. Great, I look like a hot mess. What is this on my pants? Is that diaper cream? Perfect.”
Amidst the chaos—kids running wild, the TV blaring, and not having looked in a mirror for hours—my husband walked in, came over, wrapped his arms around me, and gave me a kiss that felt like a scene from a movie. In that moment, time stood still.
This life we’re building together? I wouldn’t want to share it with anyone else, even with his little narcoleptic moments.
If you’re navigating similar challenges, check out this post on home insemination for some support and advice. For more resources, visit CCRM IVF, where you can find great information related to pregnancy. And if you need supplies, Make a Mom offers the essential kits to help you on your journey.
In summary, balancing the demands of parenting and a relationship can be tough, but the love and connection can shine through even in the chaos!