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It’s Completely Fine to Just Say ‘No’
Hey there, New Mom!
Welcome to the incredible journey of motherhood! Huge congrats on your beautiful little one! Since you announced your pregnancy, you’ve probably been showered with all kinds of advice—some of it useful, some of it questionable, and some that’s just plain strange. While you might feel inclined to nod and smile through it all, there’s one piece of wisdom I really want you to embrace in the coming weeks: it’s totally okay to say “no.”
The next few weeks are likely to be a whirlwind—don’t fret, that’s perfectly normal. Your life has been turned upside down in the most amazing way! You might find yourself feeling exhausted, anxious, and mostly focused on caring for your baby. And that’s perfectly alright. In those early days, people understand. Neighbors might drop off frozen meals, family members may help with chores, and friends will insist on holding your little one while you catch up on rest. Nobody’s judging you for the dishes piling up or the grass that needs mowing. Enjoy these moments—they’re tough, but with a supportive circle, you can take a breather and concentrate on what truly matters.
However, a curious shift happens when your baby hits the one-month mark. While your little one is still in that sweet eat-sleep-poop routine, the outside world seems to forget how new they still are. To others—especially those without kids—a month feels like ample time for you to bounce back to your pre-baby life. But let’s be honest, that life comes with commitments that can feel overwhelming now.
Sure, last fall you baked dozens of cookies for the church bake sale, but this fall, even buying the ingredients feels like a monumental task. So remember, it’s okay to just say “no.”
Last year, you organized your cousin’s bridal shower, but with baby brain in full swing, you might struggle to manage your laundry piles, let alone host an event. It’s completely fine to just say “no.”
And yes, catching up with college friends over lunch sounds delightful, but if you’re concerned about germs around your newborn or the venue is too cramped for a car seat, it’s okay to just say “no.”
You have the right to decline invitations because it’s nap time, you’re feeling drained, or simply because you don’t feel up to it. You can say “no” because your baby has an off afternoon, or you want to savor every moment before heading back to work. It’s alright if you prefer a quiet night in with your partner or worry about the noise levels around your little one. Whatever your reasons, if you’re not feeling it, it’s perfectly acceptable to just say “no.”
You can decline kindly or firmly, offer an explanation or keep it simple—what matters is that you stand by your decision. Motherhood, especially in those early days, can be incredibly demanding. Don’t feel guilty for prioritizing yourself, your baby, and your family. As time goes on, you’ll find yourself saying “yes” more often, and eventually, those moments will outweigh the “no’s.”
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Summary
Embracing the early days of motherhood often means learning to say “no.” It’s completely okay to prioritize your needs and your baby’s, whether it’s declining social engagements or letting go of previous commitments. Remember, as you navigate this new chapter, it’s important to focus on what truly matters without feeling guilty.