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Why I Bought My Son a Tiara
By: Sarah Thompson
Updated: Feb. 5, 2021
Originally Published: Sep. 21, 2015
I bought my 2-year-old son a tiara for the same reason I picked up that Batman shirt he adored at the store. It’s the same motivation behind getting him the Sofia doll his friend Emily has and the superheroes we’ve been collecting on eBay for weeks (no worries, buddy, your Shazam and Green Lantern will be here soon!).
The tiara was a reflection of his genuine interest, and at this age, I feel it’s crucial to encourage his natural curiosity. He’s in a magical phase where he can dive into imaginative play with such joy and wonder—his eyes light up as he explores.
It was during our shoe shopping adventure that I decided to get him the tiara. While I was chasing him around the aisles trying to fit him for sneakers, he spotted the pink tiara sparkling on the shelf. He exclaimed that he loved it because it was “pink,” “spawkly,” and “bootiful.” After he held it, he finally sat still long enough for me to check if the sneakers fit. They did (thank goodness), and off he went again, which led us to the register to buy both the sneakers and the tiara.
I’m really fortunate to live in a progressive area surrounded by friends and family who embrace the idea of a little boy wearing a tiara and enjoying a collection of princess figures. I love that he confidently walked through the mall wearing it, even when it ended up on his grilled cheese sandwich—he wore it until he had his fill.
But let me be clear: if anyone had made a negative remark about him wearing that tiara, I would have been ready to defend him fiercely. (I’m not normally aggressive, but my words would have been sharp.)
It’s frustrating to see children boxed into gender roles from such a young age. It bothers me that I felt even a flicker of concern while he wore the tiara, just as I did when he showed interest in a pair of high-heeled shoes in the store.
Right now, he’s a blank canvas regarding gender. I want his understanding of beauty and joy to stem from his own heart, not from society’s expectations of what boys and girls should enjoy. I know that as he grows and interacts more with the world, he’ll inevitably encounter gender norms and may feel pressured to conform.
I have no idea where he’ll stand in a few years. I’ll absolutely support him if he chooses to embrace traditional tastes. I understand the need to fit in, and many kids ultimately align with their assigned gender. In fact, he may very well outgrow his interest in princesses and tiaras.
However, if he decides to keep loving pink, frilly, and sparkly things despite any peer pressure, I’ll be his biggest cheerleader. And if anyone dares to make him feel bad about it, they better watch out because my protective mama instincts will be ready to spring into action.
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Summary:
This article reflects on the author’s decision to buy her son a tiara, emphasizing the importance of nurturing a child’s interests regardless of societal gender norms. She expresses her hope that her son can explore his passions freely and affirms her commitment to support him, no matter how his preferences evolve over time.