This chapter of our lives has certainly been a test for us. It’s no surprise really, as many have warned us about the challenges that come with the early years of marriage. And here we are, right in the thick of it.
I’ve noticed we aren’t alone in feeling this way. Lately, I’ve seen friends our age announcing the end of their marriages. At first, it takes me aback—how can such young couples throw in the towel so soon? But as we sit together, exhausted and glued to our screens after another long day, I find myself understanding their struggles a little more. It’s true what they say: marriage can be tough. The whole “for better or for worse” thing hasn’t always been easy for us either. In just a few short years, we’ve faced a whirlwind of life changes—new jobs, unexpected job changes, and positions we haven’t enjoyed at all. We’ve moved homes, experienced a miscarriage, dealt with health issues, and mourned the loss of loved ones. On top of that, we’ve tackled financial strains and more adult decisions than I thought we’d have to face so early in our journey.
Let’s be real: bringing children into the mix has been one of the biggest challenges. We bicker over things that wouldn’t be issues if we didn’t have kids, like who gets up at the crack of dawn with our little alarm clock, who manages the tantrums in the grocery aisle, or why cookies seem to magically appear just before dinner.
These days, we have so little time just for us. When we do manage to find a moment, it often revolves around mundane tasks like catching up on our favorite shows, wandering aimlessly through stores just to escape the chaos, or sitting in a theater munching on candy that we usually deny the kids. Our conversations are scarce, and when we do talk, it’s often to vent our frustrations at one another.
I know there have been moments during our silly arguments when we’ve questioned if this is what our early years should be like. We’ve wondered if we’re the only ones struggling to entertain our restless toddler on those long weekends. We’ve asked ourselves why we argue about who gets to watch the kids instead of enjoying our free time together.
Since becoming parents, we’ve both let self-care slide in favor of catching some sleep. We might even be embracing those classic “mom and dad bods.” Our outings with friends have dwindled, and our idea of a wild night is ordering takeout so we can avoid kitchen clean-up.
In just a few short years, our marriage has evolved significantly. To some, it might seem mundane. But I want you to know this: I’m not surprised by this season. I expected it to be tough. I understand that we won’t just “grow out” of the hard times. Life won’t be as simple as mastering a skill; each new phase will bring its own set of challenges. Our marriage will continue to evolve, and we’ll undoubtedly face growing pains along the way.
Yet, despite all the hardships, I cherish our life together. I love our quirky, simple existence. Even when I don’t always show it, I love you through those quiet evenings spent in front of the TV, just because I’m next to you. I appreciate you while we tackle financial worries and tough choices together. Though we’ve faced obstacles as a young married couple, I recognize this is merely a phase, and I’m thankful to be experiencing it with you.
Yes, it’s tough sometimes. And there will be more difficulties ahead, no doubt. There will be days when I adore you and days when I’m not quite as fond. We’ll experience euphoric moments and times when our faith is what keeps us connected. There will be challenges that we haven’t yet faced, along with joyful moments we’ll want to hold on to forever. We’ll navigate through the boring and chaotic, the easy and tough, the joys and struggles, the late nights and early mornings. Life will keep changing, and so will we.
But one thing will remain constant: through every season, my dear Partner, I will love you and the life we’re building together.
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In summary, marriage is a journey filled with ups and downs, especially in the early years. While the challenges may be daunting, the love and connection we share remain unwavering. Together, we can navigate the complexities and cherish the moments that matter.