10 Things You Should and Shouldn’t Say to a Friend Going Through Divorce

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Going through a divorce can be one of the toughest experiences in life, especially when it feels like the person you once cherished has become a stranger. Your friend needs your support, but not all advice is helpful. Here are some friendly suggestions on what to say (and what to avoid) when your buddy, let’s say Jane, is navigating this challenging time.

What Not to Say vs. What to Say

Don’t Say: You shouldn’t talk about him so much. Stop obsessing!
Do Say: So, what else did he do this week that drove you up the wall? Seriously? He really pulled that? What a jerk!

Don’t Say: Here’s a potted plant for your new place!
Do Say: I almost brought you a plant as a housewarming gift, but then I thought you might not have the energy to keep it alive. So, I brought this giant bottle of wine instead!

Don’t Say: Maybe now isn’t the right time to splurge on a new mattress.
Do Say: Let’s go pick out some new sheets! 800 thread count, my treat!

Don’t Say: I’m envious you get a break from the kids three nights a week.
Do Say: That sounds rough! Can I buy you a drink? He’s such a jerk.

Don’t Say: You should exercise; it’ll help you feel better.
Do Say: You look a bit thin lately, so I baked you some cookies!

Don’t Say: Just because we see him occasionally doesn’t mean we’re on his side.
Do Say: We hang out with him just to gather intel for you. Honestly, we can’t stand him!

Don’t Say: Why do you care if he has a girlfriend already?
Do Say: Let’s revamp your dating profile and add some fabulous new pics!

Don’t Say: Want to go for a mani-pedi?
Do Say: How about we go egg his girlfriend’s house instead?

Don’t Say: You should focus on your kids and take a break from dating.
Do Say: I saw some condoms on sale at the store, so I got you a few boxes!

Don’t Say: Now might not be the best time to explore amateur films.
Do Say: Okay, fair enough!

Remember, what Jane really needs is support, understanding, and a loyal friend who’s there to lift her spirits. So, whether it’s a little laughter or a strong drink, just be there for her. And if you’re curious about family-building options, check out this excellent resource on pregnancy and home insemination.

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Summary

Divorce is a tough journey, and as a supportive friend, knowing the right words to say can make all the difference. Offer understanding, a listening ear, and perhaps even a drink or two. Your friend will appreciate your loyalty and kindness during this challenging time.