Your cart is currently empty!
To My Future Daughter-in-Law
I consider myself fortunate to have a wonderful relationship with my husband’s mother. She is caring, understanding, and always respectful of my choices. She never interferes, judges, or dictates how I should live my life. In fact, she tends to spoil me in the best ways!
Now, before you think I’m just bragging, dear daughter-in-law-to-be (or son-in-law, if that’s the case), let me share something. As the mother of a son, I’m learning a lot about how I want to approach the role of mother-in-law to you. My goal is to be the best mother-in-law possible.
In talking with friends, I’ve heard the frustrations of daughters-in-law dealing with mothers-in-law who can be passive-aggressive or overly critical, and I’ve witnessed the eye rolls and sighs at the mention of family visits. I want to be different.
My parents referred to each other’s mothers as “Mom,” which felt natural for them. I don’t have any expectations for you; you can call me whatever feels right—Kristin, Nonna if you have kids, or anything else, just not something you’d use for your worst enemy.
When it comes to children, I promise I won’t bombard you with questions about when you plan to start a family. If you have one child, I won’t pressure you for another. Believe me, someone once made a comment to me that was unnecessarily harsh, and it really upset me.
I might spoil your kids a little, if you permit me, but I will respect your wishes regarding food allergies and other rules. I’ll be the kind of grandmother who is excited to babysit and support your parenting decisions, whether you choose to use cloth or disposable diapers, breastfeed or bottle-feed, or have different sleep strategies. There’s enough unsolicited advice out there, and I’m here to cheer you on.
I understand that to maintain a close relationship with my son, I need to build a good rapport with the person he loves. I want to embrace you as part of our family, and if you’re open to it, I’d love to care for you like my own child. If you have a close bond with your mom, don’t worry—I’m not here to replace her. Instead, I hope to be a supportive friend, someone you can turn to if you need guidance or just want to share a laugh.
I genuinely ask you to give me a chance. Please don’t assume that all mothers-in-law are like the wicked stepmothers in fairy tales. I’m not here to compete or create distance. If my son loves you, then I know you are truly special. We’re on the same team.
I’ve heard stories of men who, at the urging of their partners, have distanced themselves from their mothers, leaving them heartbroken. I can’t imagine how painful that must be. It’s a daunting thought.
As a mother, raising a son has made me realize that letting them go can be just as challenging as navigating the teenage years. They often leap into adulthood with determination, wanting to find their own identities, even if it means flying far from home.
I want to share with you the sweet memories of my son’s childhood, from rocking him to sleep at night to his funny little phrases as a preschooler. I hope to recount his dreams and accomplishments from when he was young and fill in the details of stories he may have shared with you.
I’m here not to impose but to shower you with love and support, just as my mother-in-law does for me.
For more information on home insemination, check out this excellent resource on pregnancy and home insemination. If you’re curious about enhancing fertility, take a look at these fertility supplements that can help.
In summary, I’m excited about the possibility of welcoming you into our family. I promise to be a supportive, loving mother-in-law who respects your choices and embraces you as one of my own.