Things I Wish You Knew, From Your Nanny

home insemination Kit

Having spent years as your nanny, we’ve built quite the bond. Considering how many times I’ve seen you dash to the laundry room in just your underwear this week, perhaps we’ve gotten a little too close! But despite our familiarity—whether it’s swaddling your newborn, celebrating your promotions, or sharing the latest scoop about that tattooed bartender who just had a baby with my college friend—there are some things I can’t bring myself to tell you, but I really wish you understood:

1. I hesitate to snack on your food, especially anything unopened. You’ve told me countless times to help myself, but I can’t shake the feeling that you’ll somehow know I polished off half the bag of pretzels. It’s not like I don’t witness you occasionally forgetting your car keys, wearing mismatched shoes, or even driving off with your coffee cup still on the roof! But in my mind, it’s the pretzel bag that you’ll keep track of. Oddly enough, I don’t have the same anxiety when I’m sneaking your child’s gummy vitamins.

2. I have zero interest in your husband. Seriously. I get that you fell for him for good reasons—he’s a decent guy and a great dad. But I’ve seen him leave dirty dishes in the sink when the dishwasher is just a step away. Any tiny flicker of attraction vanished the moment I caught him dramatically suffering from a cold. While I appreciate how he contributes to your family, if he takes out the trash one more time without replacing the bag, I might lose it!

3. You inspire me. You’re like the older sister I never had. You’ve got a fantastic job, stylish clothes from catalogs, and a home that could be a magazine cover. From my current spot on a futon, you’re practically a celebrity. I want to emulate you, even if it means splurging on the same beauty products you swear by.

4. I’m not superhuman. My patience isn’t magic; it comes from knowing I can leave at the end of the day. After a tough day filled with tantrums and diaper disasters, I relish the escape at 5:30 p.m. where I can indulge in a peaceful bubble bath and binge-watch something that isn’t PAW Patrol. If you could steal away for a few evenings like that, I bet you’d manage those toddler meltdowns with a lot more grace, too.

5. A little gratitude goes a long way. I know you’re paying me to do my job, but this role is unlike any other. It’s filled with both challenges and rewards that aren’t measured by a paycheck. What makes it all worthwhile is knowing I’m making a meaningful impact. Your appreciation—expressed with genuine thanks—means more to me than you can imagine.

For more insights into parenting and home insemination, check out this helpful resource. And if you’re looking for expert advice on fertility, this authority offers great information. Plus, don’t miss out on these infertility resources for additional support.

In summary, as your nanny, I cherish our relationship and the journey we’ve shared. I simply wish you understood some of my unspoken feelings, from my quirky food anxieties to my admiration for your life. Your recognition and gratitude really make a difference in how I experience this unique job.