Stop Asking Me If I’m Going to Try for a Girl

home insemination Kit

I’m a proud mom of two amazing boys. They’re bright, happy, and bring so much joy to my life. Yet, almost every day, someone feels compelled to ask me if I’m planning to try for a girl. Honestly, it’s such an inconsiderate and intrusive question. So, can we please just stop?

Seriously, when did it become acceptable for people to ask others if they’re satisfied with their children? Just a few weeks after my second son was born, we visited a restaurant, and the waiter immediately asked, “So, when are you going to try for a girl?” I was still recovering from childbirth, and here I was, being asked about a future baby—specifically, a girl.

Here’s the truth: I did hope for a daughter. I even penned an article about that desire. So, when people ask me if I’m “going for the girl,” it feels like a punch to the gut, a reminder of the daughter I always envisioned. I won’t get to braid her hair, teach her about influential women, or help her choose a wedding dress if she decides to get married someday. Every time someone brings it up, I have to smile, shake my head, and silently mourn the little girl I thought would be part of my life.

What makes this even tougher is that my almost five-year-old son hears these comments too. How does he process that? Does he think he’s not enough just because he’s not a girl? I always emphasize how wonderful my boys are, but I worry he might internalize the idea that having a girl is somehow more valuable.

I consider myself fortunate to have two children. However, my journey hasn’t been straightforward. After my older son’s emergency C-section, I learned that I have a uterine anomaly—I only have half of a functional uterus. Carrying two pregnancies to term is a privilege I don’t take lightly, especially since many women struggle with infertility. So, do I want to try for a girl? Honestly, I’m not even sure I can get pregnant again.

But let’s think about those who do want more children and face challenges. What about women who have experienced miscarriages or lost a child? These questions can be incredibly hurtful and remind them of what they’ve lost. It’s a sensitive topic that deserves kindness and respect, not casual inquiries.

Ultimately, my reproductive choices are private, and while I share personal stories, I’m not interested in discussing my family planning with strangers. I shouldn’t have to shrug off something so deeply personal.

So, the next time you see a parent at the park, please choose your questions wisely. Skip asking parents of boys if they want a girl or parents of girls if they want a boy. And definitely avoid questioning parents about their family size. You never know what someone might be going through.

For a deeper understanding of family planning and related topics, check out this excellent resource on IVF and fertility preservation. And if you’re curious about home insemination, visit BabyMaker at Home Insemination Kit for more information. Remember, it’s important to be sensitive and respectful of others’ journeys!

Summary:

As a mother of two boys, I often face intrusive questions about whether I plan to try for a girl. These inquiries can be painful and insensitive, especially for those who may have faced fertility challenges or loss. It’s essential to respect personal choices regarding family planning and avoid making presumptive comments about someone else’s children. Instead, let’s foster understanding and compassion in our conversations.