To The Supermarket Cashier: I Don’t Need Your Judgment

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“Do you have a rewards card?” the supermarket cashier asks me with a smile. I hand it over, and suddenly we’re in a strange game of mental gymnastics, where I’m trying to defend my choices without saying a word.

This guy looks new, and he clearly knows nothing about me. Yet, I can feel him scrutinizing my frozen food selections. “What about those Lean Cuisines?” I think. “Sure, they’re loaded with salt and preservatives, but I only eat them for lunch! And yes, I know the Lean Cuisines are parked right next to the ice cream, but I’m not the only one here. I have a husband and kids who need treats too!”

I hope he notices that I brought my reusable bags—at least that’s something I’m doing right. But instead, I catch a flicker of disdain on his face. Great. I can practically hear his internal monologue judging my choices.

“Listen,” I think to him. “I get it; you’re rolling your eyes at the chicken nuggets. But maybe if microwaves hadn’t been invented, our kids wouldn’t love these quick meals so much! I’m not home cooking gourmet dinners while managing a million other tasks. So what if chicken nuggets are part of the mix? Look over there! That stew meat I’m buying? I’m making beef stroganoff! Sure, I’m not a nutritionist, but I’ll cook it from scratch in a Crock-Pot—alongside some frozen asparagus. Yes, fresh is better, but hey, at least I’m buying veggies! There are green beans and broccoli right here!”

I realize I’ve forgotten to pull the items from under the cart. I usually do that first, but I got sidetracked. The cashier thanks me as I hold up a pack of diet root beer for him to scan, but I can sense his condescending vibe. “Just so you know, that’s not for my kids—just for me! My kids mostly drink water! Well, and milk. And yes, I know those Kool-Aid Jammers are sugary, but I don’t buy them every week.”

This guy is a challenge. I think I’d prefer the self-checkout. Now he’s reaching for the cereal. Fabulous.

“Okay, sugary cereal—guilty as charged,” I admit in my head. “But I used to buy Fruity Cheerios, which were great for cholesterol! I stopped only because they vanished from the shelves. Don’t judge me for making a tough choice!”

One of the Lunchables won’t scan. Ugh, I hate buying those, but I’ve only got two this time, which doesn’t seem too bad. I try to give him a look that says, “Yep, my kids eat Lunchables; what’s it to you?”

He finally moves on to the produce. I left that for last so it wouldn’t get squished, and it’s a nice touch to redeem myself. “See those grapes? They’re not on sale, but I’m buying them! Because I love my family. Do you know how much time I spent cutting up cantaloupe and watermelon this summer? A lot! Look, apples and pears too—yes, I don’t even like pears, but they’re going in my house. And see this spinach, green peppers, and tomatoes? So it looks like I’m not just loading up on frozen food!”

Maybe I was a bit harsh. Is he judging the eggs now?

“Oh come on, eggs are good for you! We’ve gone back and forth on this for years. This is exactly why you shouldn’t judge me! What’s that? You say you weren’t judging me at all?”

“That’ll be $267.85,” the cashier says, breaking my mental rant.

I pay and say cheerfully, “Have a great day!” as he tells me the same. I’m convinced I won that argument that never happened, so I can afford to be kind.

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In Summary

Shopping can sometimes feel like an unspoken battle, especially when you sense judgment from others. But at the end of the day, we’re all just trying to do our best for our families—frozen meals and all.