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A Letter from a Working Mom to Her Daughter on Her Birthday
Dear Emma,
Happy Birthday! Every year, I’m amazed at how fast you’re growing up. There’s a depth to our mother-daughter bond that you won’t fully grasp until you have kids of your own. Tonight, I experienced one of those emotions for the first time.
I had everything planned out for your little birthday bash a whole week in advance. I picked up all the ingredients for your favorite meal and made a list of the colorful icing you wanted for your cupcakes. We were so excited to bake your cake together and enjoy pineapple pizza until we couldn’t eat another bite.
Like many moms, I’m not just a mother; I’m also a career woman, and I take pride in both roles. Just as I meticulously organized your birthday, I also schedule my workdays with intention. I strive to pour my heart into my job while ensuring I’m present for you. I run errands during my lunch breaks and look forward to seeing your smiling face at the end of each workday.
I’m proud to be both a professional and a mom because I believe women deserve the same respect in the workplace as men. I want to ensure you grow up in a world where professional equality is the norm. It’s essential for you to know that having an identity beyond just “Mom” is perfectly acceptable. If you choose to have a family, I hope you also chase your passions and that no one asks you how you juggle work and motherhood right off the bat.
However, I also want you to know that it’s completely normal to have moments like I did tonight. Despite my planning, I ended up working late, which meant we ordered pizza instead of making it, and the cupcakes got a single color of store-bought icing instead of all five.
Even though I know you didn’t mind those small hiccups, I felt a wave of guilt wash over me. It was my first taste of guilt for wanting both a career and to be a good mom. I cried in my room after you were asleep, feeling like I had been a successful career woman but a less-than-stellar mom.
I can’t pinpoint exactly why I felt that way. Perhaps it’s the lingering societal pressures on mothers to be the primary caregiver. Maybe it’s because I brought you into this world on your birthday. Or perhaps it’s simply that things didn’t go perfectly as planned. Whatever the reason, I want you to know that if you ever find yourself feeling the same way, you are not alone. Don’t lose hope.
You will learn feelings as a parent that you cannot comprehend until you experience them yourself. You might feel torn between motherhood and everything else that life throws at you. When that happens, remember that questioning your capabilities as a mom is often a sign that you truly care.
I want you to know that you can be an amazing mom and pursue your passions. You don’t have to choose one over the other. As you navigate this journey, here’s a little advice from me: It won’t be easy, and honestly, I hope it’s challenging. The tough days will help you appreciate your accomplishments more deeply.
There will be moments of doubt when you wonder if it’s okay to have a life outside of being a mom. You might think that if you focus solely on motherhood, your kids will be better off. I’ve wrestled with that notion, and I want you to know that your children will thrive with a mother who is also a role model. Being a strong, successful woman is part of what makes you a great mom.
Ultimately, I hope that one day, when your own child approaches you with their dreams and challenges, you can encourage them to persevere, just as I do. Don’t let a few setbacks, even something as small as cupcake icing colors, overshadow your ability to be a wonderful mom and pursue your passions.
With all my love,
Mom
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Summary
This heartfelt letter from a working mom to her daughter celebrates her birthday while reflecting on the challenges of balancing motherhood and career. The mom shares her experiences, emotions, and advice, emphasizing that it’s possible to be both a dedicated parent and a passionate professional. She encourages her daughter to embrace her identity and pursue her dreams, reminding her that feelings of doubt are natural but do not define one’s worth as a parent.