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Just Go and (Seriously) Play
Hey there, fellow parents! You know that moment when you just want to scream, “Just go and (seriously) play!“? I find myself saying this to my kids all the time, and let me tell you, it takes every ounce of willpower to keep the frustration out of my voice. Why do my children feel the need for constant supervision and direction? It’s like I’m running a playtime agenda—“First, let’s build with blocks, then we’ll have snack time, followed by a riveting game of Candy Land.” And honestly, this is just within the confines of our home!
When it comes to outside play, well, that’s a whole other battle. I have to dress them, put on their shoes, and practically drag them outdoors, only to engage in their play as if I’m supervising a sports event. But what I really want is for them to just play freely while I tackle my own tasks!
I mean, can’t they just play together without me constantly orchestrating their fun? Here’s a snippet of my daily dialogue with my 6-year-old son:
“Your sister wants to join you, just let her!”
“She’s been eagerly waiting for you all day!”
“I played with my brother, who was much older than me.”
“Remember how close you and your sister are in age?”
“My mom was busy working and didn’t play with me.”
“Go have fun downstairs; mommy’s got dinner to make.”
“Daddy’s working too, so go on!”
And to my daughter, I once mentioned, “Dora has all sorts of adventures on her own, right?” But it seems my son is the one who struggles more with independent play.
I know there are countless articles about helicopter parenting and how it can hinder our kids’ ability to entertain themselves. I’ve been making a conscious effort to let my son be more independent, yet he still doesn’t take the initiative to play without me. It’s been six long years of guiding him through milestones while waiting for that sweet moment when he’ll venture off to find his own fun.
I’m definitely not alone in this. I have friends with multiple kids who also say their little ones can’t find ways to play together without constant guidance. When their friends come over, it’s a relief—finally, my son has someone else to entertain him!
Adding to the mix is the modern trend of open floor plans. While I love the sight lines from my beautiful kitchen to the play areas, it means I’m always within reach. My own mom had the luxury of a separate kitchen, where she could work without us bothering her. We roamed the neighborhood on our bikes, played outside unsupervised, and didn’t need her help for every little thing. It was a world of freedom, and we thrived in it.
Now, I’m in my stylish, open-concept kitchen, always available and ready to help. Maybe future generations will go back to traditional layouts that give parents a bit more privacy, allowing kids the freedom to be kids. I can see my little ones growing closer to that independence at ages 6 and 4, and I’m looking forward to the day they can set off on their own adventures. Until then, we’ll play princesses and board games together. After that, I’ll happily remind them to just go and (seriously) play while I tackle the laundry.
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In summary, we all want our kids to play freely, but sometimes they just need a gentle nudge to do it without us. Let’s embrace the chaos and allow them the space to grow.