I Grew Up Without Religion—And I’m Thankful for It

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When I think back on my upbringing, the most I encountered in terms of religious instruction were vague references to a “higher power” and a children’s Bible that was more decorative than anything—gathering dust on a shelf. The most significant lesson I received was simple: “Being a good person is what truly matters.”

I wasn’t baptized, never attended church services, and wasn’t given a strict set of beliefs to follow. Despite my parents being quite religious themselves, particularly my mother, she prioritized teaching kindness over adherence to any particular faith. She firmly believed that good values could be instilled without the need for specific religious doctrine.

My parents were more focused on my character and integrity than on any rituals I might or might not partake in. For them, morality transcended religion, and they wanted me to carve my own path rather than impose their beliefs on me. Now that I’m older, I truly appreciate their choice to let me navigate my own understanding of the world.

I’m not here to critique how others raise their children, religious or otherwise. However, I can confidently share that growing up without religion has allowed me to develop a strong moral compass. There’s a common misconception that a lack of religious upbringing leads to a void of morals. People often ask me, “How can you have values if you don’t believe in God?”

Lessons in Compassion

Let me share a story. When I was just eight years old, a car accident unfolded right in front of my family while we sat at a stoplight. Without a moment’s hesitation, my dad parked our van and rushed into the intersection to help. He helped one of the victims who was panicking, and soon, other drivers joined us to lend a hand. In that moment, I witnessed firsthand how one person’s compassion can ripple through a community.

Throughout my childhood, I was taught to assist others, look after my neighbors, and extend a helping hand wherever possible. These teachings are universal truths that don’t require a sacred text to understand. When people ask where my values come from, I think back to that day when my dad comforted a woman in distress. Whether or not a higher power was involved, I know my dad was there, embodying kindness.

I learned early on that doing good matters—not because of fear of punishment or promise of reward in an afterlife, but because it genuinely impacts people’s lives. My dad was a beacon of hope in a chaotic situation, reassuring that woman that she wasn’t alone and that help was on the way.

Shaping My Beliefs

As I grew up, I aspired to be that light for others. My parents instilled in me the belief that our actions shape the world we live in. They emphasized that my generation would inherit the Earth, and therefore, every act of kindness or cruelty contributes to the future we create. I took that lesson to heart.

Contrary to popular belief, I didn’t grow up aimlessly or without purpose. Instead, I was driven to be a positive force for change and a source of comfort in times of need. So, what does a person raised without religion come to believe?

My brother has his own journey—he identifies as a moderate Christian and holds his beliefs dearly. Meanwhile, I identify as an open-minded atheist who proudly occupies a different space. (Apparently, a person without religion can turn out to be quite diverse!) Regardless of where we stand, I’m grateful I was allowed to discover my beliefs without being told they defined my worth or morals.

Advocacy and Values

When I share my atheism, I sometimes face cringes or even hostility, but I’ve learned to let it slide. My focus lies elsewhere. I’m dedicated to dismantling the stigma surrounding mental health, creating inclusive spaces for the LGBTQ+ community, advocating against inequality, and educating myself and others about systemic injustice.

In line with what my parents taught me, I strive to do good and leave the world better than I found it. For someone who supposedly lacks “real” morality, I think I’m doing quite well.

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In summary, growing up without religion has shaped my moral framework through kindness, empathy, and a desire to uplift others. My upbringing taught me that compassion and good deeds matter, regardless of religious affiliations.