20 Things That Are Simpler Than Parenting Teens

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We all know that parenting can be incredibly challenging, yet it’s also one of the most fulfilling roles you can take on. Each stage of childhood brings its own challenges and growth opportunities, and just when you think you’ve got it figured out, everything changes. One day, I found myself with three pre-teens, and let me tell you, it’s only getting trickier (or so other parents warn me). Suddenly, I’m yearning for the good old days of sleepless nights and hunting for lost pacifiers. Honestly, I’d pick a toddler tantrum any day over the complexities of raising a teenager.

The balance of parenting teens is delicate; you want to guide them while also giving them the space to stumble and learn from their own mistakes. It’s a daunting task, and I worry about messing it up. Telling my future teens, “Don’t have sex” isn’t going to cut it; we all know how those directives go. On the flip side, encouraging them with “Yes! Go for it! It’s amazing!” feels a bit much too.

Setting clear expectations and equipping them with the right tools to make informed decisions is crucial. Then, it’s a matter of stepping back and hoping for the best. Raising a respectful, kind teenager is undoubtedly going to be the biggest parenting challenge I’ve faced. In fact, I can think of 20 things that might be easier:

1. Swimming under the moonlight right after watching Jaws.
2. Attempting a backbend after devouring a chili cheese dog and blooming onion.
3. Snagging a royal family heirloom.
4. Managing three kids in diapers simultaneously.
5. Cultivating delicate award-winning orchids in freezing temperatures.
6. Running a marathon uphill while being chased by zombies, all while keeping your heart rate down.
7. Battling fire-breathing dragons with a toothbrush while wearing flammable clothing.
8. Shaving a lightning bolt into your hair while nine months pregnant.
9. Exiting Target without dropping a hundred bucks.
10. Scraping ice off your car using only a Lego.
11. Potty training a two-year-old who thinks the toilet will eat him.
12. Picking up a soaked turd from the bathtub using toothpicks.
13. Performing head spins on a pile of fire ants.
14. Sticking to a diet during the holidays while working in a bakery.
15. Teaching your dog to stop sniffing butts and crotches.
16. Becoming a tightrope walker with absolutely no balancing skills.
17. Enduring fingernails on a chalkboard for three hours straight.
18. Eating just one Oreo during PMS when they’re the only food available.
19. Navigating the world’s largest corn maze with three screaming toddlers.
20. Achieving all your New Year’s resolutions for the rest of your life.

I know I’ll make mistakes, overreach, not engage enough, or snoop too much, but that’s part of the journey. I’ll cherish the little moments that make it all worthwhile, even amidst the serious talks about drugs, drinking, and driving. Because at the end of the day, our kids are worth every bit of effort.

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In summary, parenting teens is a unique and challenging experience, but it’s manageable with the right mindset and approach. Embrace the chaos and seek out the joyful moments, because they truly make it all worth it.