“Just wait until you have kids.”
Even as a parent now, that phrase still makes me cringe. Recently, while I was managing my daughter at the grocery store, another shopper casually remarked, “Just wait until you have two!” At first glance, it seemed innocent enough, but a flurry of thoughts raced through my mind. Why do you assume I’m planning for another child? What if I’m struggling with infertility—how would your comment make me feel? And why does it feel like a competition over whose grocery store outing is the most chaotic?
I forced a polite smile and returned to my shopping list, but I promised myself I would never say “just wait until you…” to anyone else. When I was single, people often said, “Just wait until you’re married.” Then I heard “wait until you have kids” countless times. Even back in college, the older folks would say, “Just wait until you’re in the real world.”
Now that I’m married and a mom, I still don’t quite grasp the meaning behind those comments. My life had meaning and joy even before marriage and parenthood. Yes, things have changed, bringing more exhaustion and more happiness, but my life still holds purpose.
We often find ourselves in a weird contest to prove we’re busier, more sleep-deprived, or dealing with tougher challenges than others. But the truth is, we don’t know the full extent of what others are facing. Life throws curveballs—work pressures, relationship struggles, health issues, and a multitude of other challenges.
I won’t say “wait until…” because it dismisses what someone is currently experiencing. It overlooks their worth right now and instead emphasizes how much harder things might get. Sometimes, silence is golden. A simple, understanding smile that conveys, “I’ve been there, and you’re doing great” works wonders. If you’re curious to learn more about navigating these conversations, check out this insightful post here.
For more on the subject of home insemination, this resource is incredibly informative. Additionally, this link offers valuable insights into pregnancy and home insemination.
In summary, let’s be mindful of our words. Life’s challenges are valid no matter where you are in your journey, and a little compassion goes a long way.