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Long Locks, No Worries: Why I’m Embracing My Sons’ Long Hair
People often mistake my boys for girls. When that happens, I gently correct them, saying “he” instead of “she.” Strangers usually look embarrassed, muttering apologies as if thinking my sons looking feminine is some kind of insult. I always brush it off with a smile, reassuring them that it’s perfectly alright. When your kids have long hair, those moments are just part of the experience.
I’ve always had a fondness for long hair on boys. In college, I would encourage my boyfriends to grow their locks out, and I spent countless hours trying to persuade my husband to skip the barber. So, when I became a mom of boys, I knew I wanted to let their hair flow.
My eldest, Jake, nearly derailed my plans. He was born bald and remained that way for almost a year. But soon, his hair began to sprout—though it didn’t quite fall straight. His hair had an adorable, wild look reminiscent of a miniature Einstein. On the other hand, my middle son, Max, has perfect surfer hair that flows beautifully past his shoulders. And while it’s still too soon to predict with my youngest, Leo, he’s already developing some cute beachy curls.
My mother and in-laws often raise their eyebrows at my decision. They would prefer the classic short styles typically associated with boys. My in-laws keep their opinions to themselves, while my mom openly wishes she could take the kids for a trim. These objections mainly stem from traditional views on gender roles, where boys traditionally sport short hair. But I choose to ignore them.
There have been other comments about my boys’ hairstyles too. Someone once said they looked scruffy, and while I chuckled then, I learned that a little trim can help maintain their locks without sacrificing length. My eldest’s hair was indeed unruly, fuzzing out in all directions. So, with a heavy heart, I had to cut off some of his baby hair to help it grow longer. He resembled a little sheep after the cut, but he now enjoys his shorter style and assures me it will grow back.
The important thing is that my sons love their hair. Jake is determined to grow his out, while Max proudly tells anyone who asks that he’s aiming for hair down to his knees. Leo is too young to voice his preference, but when the time comes, I’ll definitely ask. And if he wants a haircut, I’ll respect his wishes, even if it brings a few tears to my eyes.
Max knows that having long hair means some extra care. We have to watch out for tangles, and if anything gets stuck, bath time is a must, followed by a good wash and condition. Each morning, I brush his hair, sometimes even straightening it. He claims he enjoys it, but he knows he has to be still during the process.
Occasionally, other kids will mistake them for girls or wonder why the “girls” are wearing Star Wars shirts. We correct them, and most kids understand. Thankfully, my boys haven’t yet encountered any mean remarks about their hair, perhaps because long hair on boys is becoming more common these days or maybe because we tend to associate with a laid-back crowd.
I adore their long, silky hair. I love that they have chosen their own hairstyles, free from rigid societal expectations. Most importantly, I cherish that their hair is a reflection of their individuality—long, beautiful, and a little different from the norm. And that’s pretty amazing.
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Summary
This blog post reflects on the author’s decision to let her sons grow their hair long, embracing their individuality and challenging traditional gender norms. Despite some societal pressures and family opinions, she finds joy in their choices and the beauty of their long locks.