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Don’t Judge Me for What’s in My Son’s Lunch Box
Not long ago, my third-grader came home with a tale about a school aide who questioned his lunch, which consisted solely of snacks. “Mom,” he said, “maybe you should start packing sandwiches again.” I couldn’t help but chuckle. The last few sandwiches I sent with him were all returned untouched. Peanut butter and jelly? Too mushy. Nutella? Not enough spread. Cheese? Soggy. The saga continues.
I’ve tried thermoses full of pasta and even leftovers from his favorite meals. But no matter my efforts, his lunch typically comes back with nibbles or completely intact. Yes, my son is a picky eater. Even at 9, he’s a challenge at mealtime. While he has improved at home and will eat a variety of fruits and proteins, school is a different story. The lunchroom is chaotic, and my chatterbox would rather socialize than eat. Plus, I genuinely believe he has a heightened sense of taste—cafeteria food? No thanks.
Although my son hasn’t been diagnosed with sensory processing issues, he shows many related traits—sensitivity to clothing, a low pain threshold, and, of course, his finicky palate. I’ve learned not to battle him over it. Picky eating can linger into the double digits, according to parenting expert Lisa Grant. So, in order to ensure he doesn’t go hungry—and knowing that he gets proper nutrition at home—I pack what he’s willing to consume. Granola bars, cheese crackers, and on a good day, a handful of nuts or raisins. I do my best to include protein with his carbs, but fruits and veggies? Only at home.
It’s far from ideal. Much like any other parent, I’m navigating the challenges with the resources I have. For now, I’m just relieved he eats something before returning home.
About that school aide’s comment? I understand her concern. If I glimpsed into my son’s lunch box, I might also raise an eyebrow. I might even think, “Is this mom clueless about nutrition or just lazy?” But I wouldn’t voice those thoughts. A lunch box is a small piece of a much larger puzzle. I wouldn’t judge another parent because their child shows up with messy hair or a crumpled homework sheet. Who knows what else is happening at home?
I’m not suggesting the aide was judging me outright; it was merely a question. However, I know my son caught the undertones of her remark. When I asked if he preferred sandwiches he wouldn’t eat, he quickly replied that he didn’t want to seem odd to the staff. He let it go, and so did I.
Still, I was left feeling exposed. For a fleeting moment, I considered reaching out to the school and explaining my son’s lunch choices. But I quickly realized there was no need to justify myself. What would I say? “Hello, I’d like to discuss my 9-year-old’s eating habits”?
This experience highlighted how vulnerable we parents can feel to criticism. Even after years of parenting, I find myself fretting over lunch choices! Unfortunately, I’m aware that judgment regarding how I feed my kids—and countless other aspects of parenting—won’t dissipate anytime soon as they grow older. The silver lining? I’m gradually getting better at shrugging it off.
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Summary:
In this humorous reflection on lunchtime struggles, a parent recounts the challenges of packing nutritious meals for a picky eater. Despite attempts at variety, the son’s preferences lean heavily toward snacks, leading to feelings of vulnerability when faced with external judgments. Ultimately, the parent acknowledges the complexities of childhood eating habits and the judgments that come with parenting.