5 Things You Should Never Say to Single Moms

By: Emma Reed

As a single mom living in the bustling heart of New York City, I often find myself in situations where my status seems to be the main topic of discussion. Even though my children attend a wonderfully diverse elementary school, I still feel like I’m in a different world. During playdates, half the moms are eager to play matchmaker, while the other half seem obsessed with asking about the challenges of single motherhood.

Let me clarify—I’m well aware of the challenges. I don’t need constant reminders. Passive-aggressive comments can be exhausting, so here are five phrases that could use a serious makeover:

1. “It must be so hard!”

Really? I wasn’t aware that parenting came with challenges. Parenting, no matter how you slice it, is tough. Making sweeping statements about the struggles of single moms isn’t just unhelpful; it’s kind of diminishing. Unless you’re offering a hand, please keep your “sympathy” to yourself.

2. “I know a wonderful guy I can set you up with.”

Thanks, but no thanks! I’m single by choice, not because I’m on a quest to find someone to complete my life. My kids and I have a blast together, whether it’s on park adventures or building epic blanket forts. There’s nothing tragic about my single status—except maybe your perception of it!

3. “Do you ever get time to yourself?”

Not really, but thanks for the reminder! I’d love to sink into a bubble bath or enjoy an uninterrupted movie night, but that’s a luxury I can’t afford at the moment. Please think twice before asking about my private time unless you’re ready to offer some practical solutions.

4. “Are you happy?”

This question is beyond intrusive. How about you? Are you content? Asking if I’m happy implies I should be questioning my life choices. But since you asked, I find joy in self-love and acceptance. Just so you know, being married doesn’t guarantee happiness either—plenty of folks in relationships are far from blissful.

5. “How did you end up single?”

This question is often couched in awkwardness and curiosity. While I know people are just trying to connect, the truth is my reasons for being a single mom are personal. I’ll share that story when I feel comfortable, thank you very much!

And there you have it, a little public service announcement for anyone who’s ever put their foot in their mouth around a single mom. If you’re interested in exploring topics related to single parenting, check out this post on intracervical insemination. For more in-depth information, this resource is excellent for understanding pregnancy and home insemination.

In short, let’s do better, folks. Single moms are navigating their journeys with strength and grace. A little empathy goes a long way!