Excuse Me While I Spoil My Kids

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I found myself at a birthday celebration for my friend’s daughter when it all unfolded. My little one was settled comfortably on my right hip, a familiar spot for him, when my preschooler wiggled over and clung to my leg. “Mommy, Mommy, pick me up!” he begged in a tiny voice. Naturally, I lifted him onto my other hip.

As the minutes passed, I grew weary and attempted to set my baby down. But he wasn’t having it—he unleashed a performance worthy of an Oscar in “Whining Like a Pro” until I scooped him up again. I decided to put my toddler down instead. “Mommy, I need you!” he lamented with a dramatic flair.

I spotted an armchair large enough for all three of us and nestled them close until they’d had their fill of cuddles. My toddler was the first to escape, lured away by a colossal Lego creation. Meanwhile, the baby remained with me until the snack table caught his eye. He pointed excitedly, urging me to get him a snack. I lifted him back onto my hip and headed over to grab some cheese.

Just then, a woman who appeared to be a family member of my friend leaned in and said, “You really should put that baby down. He won’t learn to walk if you carry him all the time. You’ll spoil him.” I chuckled awkwardly, a nervous laugh escaping me.

“Oh, I think I’ll pass,” I managed to reply, struggling to find the right words. “You’re just going to spoil them both,” she added, gesturing at my toddler.

I continued to hold my baby for the rest of the event, laughing and chatting with friends, while a storm of frustration brewed inside. Why didn’t I defend myself? Why did I let her unsolicited advice get to me?

Now, sitting comfortably behind my screen, I finally feel bold enough to respond.

Hey there! If holding my little ones means I’m spoiling them, then bring it on. I’ll embrace being the parent of the “rotten kids” on the block, because I refuse to deny my children the warmth, safety, and comfort of my arms. Got it?

Here’s a fun fact: some adults actually pay to get hugs from strangers because they lack physical affection. Maybe you should consider joining one of those groups—it might help you lighten up!

Call me naïve, but I always thought spoiling meant granting every material wish. Sure, my kids have their share of flashy toys, but what they really need is time on me. They both crave being held, and I’m happy to oblige. It’s my role as their mom; it’s my privilege.

Let me brag a bit—while holding my baby, I can apply face cream, do my makeup, brush my teeth, and even blow-dry my hair. I can complete every bathroom trip without ever putting him down! I can cook, clean, and tidy up, all while he’s snug in his favorite spot, while my toddler pops back and forth for snuggles and chats.

So yes, I’ll keep them close. I’ll use whatever baby carrier I can find. I’ll wrap them in the Moby, clip them into the Bjorn, and strap them to my back if needed. I’ll scoop them up whenever they ask until they stop asking—because one day they will. And when that day arrives, I’ll know I’ve done my job right. Hopefully, it won’t be until they’re grown, raising their own little ones who want just as much love and affection.

Oh, hang on a sec—I feel tiny fingers tugging at my pant leg. Someone wants a snuggle, and the other one wants me to carry him, just because.

So if you’ll excuse me, I have to go spoil my kids.

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Summary:

In this humorous take on parenting, Emma Johnson shares her experiences of carrying her children and the unsolicited advice she received about spoiling them. With a strong defense of her parenting style, she highlights the importance of physical affection and connection with her kids. Rather than worrying about spoiling them, she embraces the joy of holding her children close, knowing that one day they’ll grow independent. Ultimately, she affirms her commitment to nurturing her boys in a loving and supportive environment.