How I Helped My Son Embrace His Fiery Red Hair

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My son is a redhead—at home, we affectionately call him our little “orangehead.” His hair, a stunning blend of sun-kissed sand and glimmering copper, is mesmerizing. Running my fingers through those locks feels like gazing into the depths of a tiger’s eye.

Shortly after his birth, a college friend with a similar hair hue looked down at my baby and sighed, declaring, “He’s got the curse.” My husband and I exchanged shocked glances; we had always dreamed of having kids with vibrant auburn curls. Our friend insisted that his hair made childhood a challenge, but we shrugged it off, thinking he must have had other issues at play. Now, as we navigate this journey, we’re beginning to understand.

Every time our little guy steps outside without a hat, strangers can’t help but comment. You’d think he was a celebrity with the attention he gets. Some of the most common remarks include:

• “Wow! Look at that hair!”
• “Boy, you’re gonna be trouble.”
• “Hey, Red! You’re so red!”
• “You must be a fiery little guy; I bet you have a temper!”
• “A ginger!”
• “That hair is just too much!”
• “Hey, carrot top! Did you eat a whole bag of carrots?”
• “Redheads dance with the devil!”

While these comments come from a place of admiration, my son doesn’t always see it that way. People are enchanted by his hair, but he often hears the remarks without the underlying positivity. It’s tough when what feels like innocent admiration can also make him think of his hair as something “naughty” or “weird.” As adults, we might chuckle at the comments, but for a 4-year-old, they can be confusing and sometimes hurtful.

Given our friend’s warning, I took action early on. After he turned two, I began addressing the comments directly.

“Look at that ginger!” someone would say as they passed by.

“Oh, isn’t his hair just beautiful?” I’d chime in, trying to steer the conversation.

“Trouble, huh?” they’d laugh.

“No, you must be mistaking him for someone else; he’s a kind and helpful boy!”

Most people would quickly realize their oversight and agree, “Yes, such lovely hair!” Yet, I felt like we needed more.

The representation for red-haired boys is surprisingly scarce. While redheaded girls face their own stereotypes, they also have a fair number of positive portrayals to lean on. Boys, however, often find themselves depicted as the mean kid in storybooks or as bumbling fools in ads.

Then, ESPN stepped in with a game-changer. The cover of their latest magazine featured Andy Dalton, looking intense yet approachable. His red hair was on full display, and he exuded confidence and charm—a far cry from the typical clownish portrayal.

When the magazine arrived, I strategically placed it on the kitchen table near my friend, hoping to spark interest in my son. “Check out this guy!” I said casually, “Many folks think he’s quite cool and handsome.” My son leaned in, intrigued but silent.

Over the next week, I left the magazine out and said nothing more. Finally, eight days later, he approached me with the cover in hand. “Mommy,” he asked, “do you think this man’s hair is handsome?”

“Yes, buddy, I really do,” I replied, trying to hide my excitement. It was like watching a light bulb turn on—his face lit up with relief and joy.

Thank you, ESPN, for giving my son a positive image to connect with.