Do you remember what it was like to be a kid and constantly yearn for the day you’d be all grown up? (I mean, I may be vertically challenged, but I’m talking about young, not just short!) In fifth grade, I was infatuated and wished I could date. Fast forward to middle school, where I was dreaming of high school. By freshman year, I found myself wishing to be a senior, and the cycle just continued. I wanted a cell phone, a driver’s license, and the chance to mess up in life (and oh boy, did I mess up!).
When senior year rolled around, I was itching for college and the freedom that came with it. I moved to Kentucky right after graduation, enrolled in classes, decorated my dorm, and landed a gig at Churchill Downs. Did my wishing end there? Not even close! I met a charming guy, immediately thought about marriage, and three years later, I was wishing for a baby. Well, that wish came true in the form of my son, who has made me wish for an “EMERGENCY STOP” button on life. Seriously, why isn’t that a thing?
At not even 4 years old, my son is always saying, “When I get big and strong…” It’s the classic motivational mantra we all grew up with:
- Eat your dinner to help you grow big and strong!
- Go play outside! It’ll make you big and strong!
- Get your rest, drink water—one day you’ll be big and strong!
And bam! We’ve got a kid who is dreaming about the day he’s not so little anymore. Is it all the slogans to blame? Not entirely. His dad is a towering 6-foot-4 powerhouse, and naturally, our son wants to emulate him. He recognizes his dad mowing the lawn and constructing a playhouse from scratch. He loves baking with me but feels he’s “not big enough” to crack eggs into the bowl. It’s as if his mind is overflowing with creativity, but he doesn’t feel “big enough” to bring it to life. Just the other day, he looked up at his dad and exclaimed, “Daddy, I can’t wait to be as tall as you!” To this, my husband knelt down, cupped his face, and said, “Buddy, it’s perfectly fine to be little right now.” Of course, our son didn’t agree.
We’ve all been there; I know I still am. Here I am, nearing 30, wishing I didn’t look it. The dark circles, mom skin, hair that refuses to grow, and those bushy eyebrows—ugh! My whole life has been a series of wishing to be older, and now I find myself fearing aging and longing for my 20s to last longer.
If time could pause, I might just consider it. I’d love to bottle up these magical childhood moments and keep them on a shelf. But isn’t that just another wish? Maybe it’s time we stop wishing for the next stage and start embracing the present.
So, my dear son, you are already so big and strong in your own way. You are perfect just as you are. Life is beautiful right now. You’re transitioning from toddlerhood into boyhood, and you ARE big and strong. Just be YOU—the baby I always dreamed of, and the boy I will cherish forever.
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In summary, let’s pause the cycle of wishing for the future and appreciate the present. Our little ones are already growing into who they are meant to be, and it’s a beautiful journey worth savoring.