Let’s get real about childbirth, shall we? We need to have a chat about the not-so-glamorous side of labor. I remember stumbling upon a blog that mentioned how many women deal with pooping during childbirth—it’s a totally normal part of the process. I had read the scientific reasons behind it and even learned that some women might experience diarrhea as an early labor sign. I thought I was mentally ready for the possibility. I discussed my worries with my partner, Mark, making it clear that he needed to keep his composure if the situation arose. I was prepared to make a mess while bringing our little one into the world. Or so I thought.
On my due date, I was busy trying all those so-called “labor-inducing” tricks while eagerly waiting for the first signs of labor.
Did my water break? Nope, just a bit of pee.
Was that a contraction? Nah, just some gas.
Did I nearly have an accident? Oh, definitely!
Picture this: a very pregnant woman trying to roll out of bed while squeezing her legs together, fearing an embarrassing leak. It was a frantic dash to the bathroom, followed by a moment of blissful relief. Wipe, rinse, repeat. By the end, I was ready to cry at the thought of using toilet paper one more time.
Fast forward a few hours to the hospital—I was attempting to relax in the soothing jacuzzi tub with Mark by my side. Just when I thought I was in the clear, the urge to poop hit me again. So here I am, a slippery, oversized pregnant lady trying to climb out of the tub between contractions, praying I’d reach the toilet in time. I made it, but not before Mark had the unfortunate experience of being in the bathroom with me. He faced the awkward sounds and smells head-on. Bless him; he reassured me that he still found me attractive, despite the circumstances. Maybe that pre-labor “if you laugh, you’ll regret it” conversation sunk in after all…
After all that chaos, I thought I’d emptied my system and that I wouldn’t have any issues while pushing. Spoiler alert: I was wrong! Thankfully, this time it was a little more controlled.
Here’s how it went down: I was standing, clinging to Mark for dear life, while my sister-in-law, Jenna, served as my labor massage therapist, applying counter pressure to my back. My midwife was ready on the ground to catch our baby. After a couple of pushes, the urge to poop struck again! So what did I do? I announced it to everyone in the room, because honestly—who wants to be blindsided by that kind of surprise?
“I’m going to poop now. Sorry!” I declared, and my midwife assured me that it was completely fine. The nurse, who seemed to have experience in such matters, quickly grabbed some paper towels and took her position. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but that wonderful woman calmly caught my poop. To top it off, she then wiped my bottom with a warm, wet cloth—definitely a silver lining to the situation, but I digress.
I begged Jenna not to look (because she was behind me) and also pleaded with her not to smell it. She claimed she didn’t, but who knows? I definitely didn’t anticipate having that conversation with her. My bad, Jenna—please forgive me!
After all that, I finally pushed out a beautiful baby girl, who then decided to return the favor by pooping on me twice within her first half hour of life. Like mother, like daughter, right?
So, if you’re wondering whether or not women poop during childbirth, the answer is a resounding yes! And if you were looking for a candid, no-holds-barred account of what it’s really like, you’re welcome. Life gets messy, but that’s just part of the journey.
Oh, and after having the baby, there’s the delightful experience of needing to poop again—now that’s a whole other kind of adventure!
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