If I skip my runs for a few days, I become a bundle of nerves. My family can sense the change, and soon enough, my husband and kids are practically shoving my sneakers at me, saying, “Go! We need you back to your cheerful self.”
I began taking long, brisk walks as a teenager after battling severe anxiety and panic attacks. Exercise was essentially prescribed by my doctor. Getting outside helped me escape from my racing thoughts, allowing me to breathe freely and sort through my worries. The endorphins worked wonders, lifting my spirits and grounding me. While exercise isn’t the only weapon in my arsenal against anxiety (which is a relentless foe), it’s a crucial part of my mental wellness.
For over two decades, I’ve made exercise a regular part of my life. While it certainly keeps both my mind and body in good shape, my main goal has shifted away from merely losing weight. Back in the days before kids, I was fixated on achieving a sculpted physique—sometimes to an unhealthy degree. However, as I matured and embraced motherhood, my priorities changed. With my family’s curvy genes, I’ve accepted that I’m not destined to be skinny. The times I got close to that ideal were often due to unhealthy habits—not a joyous pursuit of fitness.
Now, my focus is on being happy, healthy, and sane. I exercise to prevent myself from losing my cool with my kids and to manage the stress of being their primary caregiver. I want to keep up with them as they race down the street, enjoy a long life, and hopefully be an active grandmother someday.
A few years ago, after welcoming my second child and facing new challenges as a mom, I started dreaming about running. Having never been a runner—only a walker—these dreams were exhilarating. With that newfound motivation, I bought a jogging stroller and gave running a shot. Initially, I could barely go a few blocks without feeling like I was going to hurl. But soon, I was walking and running, and within a few months, I was mostly running. As my baby grew older, I began running solo.
At first, I thought transitioning from walking to running would help me shed those pesky last five pounds of baby weight that clung to me since my first child was born nearly a decade ago. Spoiler alert: that didn’t happen (those pounds may just be my new normal). However, the satisfaction of achieving something I once thought impossible has been incredibly rewarding, particularly in managing my long-standing anxiety.
When life gets tough, I often hit the pavement, reciting “I can do this” over and over in my mind. I know it sounds cheesy (especially sharing it here), but running perfectly embodies the ups and downs we face in life.
I’m thankful my family recognizes my need to get out and run a few times a week. When I return from a jog, my kids can see the joy and tranquility radiating from me, and they rush to shower me with kisses and hugs. Kids are funny like that—they don’t care that I’m soaked in sweat. Plus, getting my exercise in means I have no choice but to shower afterward. And since my little ones understand that “Mommy needs her exercise to stay sane,” they usually let me enjoy a moment of peace while I clean up.
A long, quiet shower? That might just be the best reward for exercising.
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In summary, I exercise not just to lose weight but to maintain my sanity and happiness as a mom. It’s a crucial part of my life that helps me manage anxiety, stay active, and enjoy precious moments with my family.