An Open Letter to Parents of Allergic Kids from a Non-Allergic Parent

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Dear Allergy Parents,

Let me kick things off by saying I have a certain degree of understanding. Well, that might be a stretch. I can kind of imagine what it must be like. But if I’m being honest, I really don’t know what it’s like to be the parent of a child with allergies.

I can’t fathom the constant anxiety that grips you every moment your child isn’t in your sight, worrying that someone might whip out a peanut butter sandwich at school, smeared with the same knife used for jelly. I have no idea what it feels like to rush your little one to the ER, heart pounding, as you watch them gasp for breath or break out in hives. I can’t even begin to understand the exhausting back-and-forth conversations with restaurant staff, trying to decipher whether that burger bun contains eggs or if those mixed vegetables have any hidden peas.

And let’s not even start on the time-consuming task of filling out school release forms, your hand cramping up as you scribble, all while fearing they might get lost in the abyss of paperwork. I can’t relate to having to carefully choose which handbag to carry based on whether it can accommodate an EpiPen, nor can I imagine the sheer panic when you think it’s gone missing, only to discover it lurking beneath a pile of tissues.

So, no, I don’t truly know what it’s like to be an allergy parent. But here’s what I do know: the depth of love we have for our children. I understand that fierce protectiveness that makes you want to keep your child sheltered forever, while also recognizing that the ultimate goal is to guide them towards independence. I get the desire for your child to be healthy, happy, and brave. I get it because I love my child with everything I’ve got.

While I may not understand the intricacies of being an allergy parent, I pledge to do my best to empathize with your journey. I will reach out to learn what your child can safely eat instead of fixating on what’s off-limits. I’ll make those extra trips to multiple grocery stores to hunt down that elusive brand of cookies your daughter can enjoy. I will listen intently as you share all the foods your son can’t have when he comes over to play.

I’ll remember to check if your child has any allergies. I’ll take my son’s requests to avoid PB&J and trail mix seriously because I know your child’s safety matters, and we don’t want him to feel isolated at lunchtime. I will recognize that you are simply a parent doing your utmost to keep your child safe, just like the rest of us.

Because while I might not know the challenges of being an allergy parent, I truly understand the love that drives you—love that we all share.

If you want to dive deeper into parenting topics, check out one of our other blog posts here: sample page. For those navigating the world of fertility, Make A Mom is a great resource to help you along the way. And if you’re seeking information on pregnancy and home insemination, ACOG’s page on treating infertility is an excellent resource.

In summary, while I may not have personal experience as an allergy parent, I stand ready to support you with understanding and compassion.