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What NOT to Say to a Pregnant Woman Battling Severe Morning Sickness
Pregnancy can be a magical time, but for some, it’s more like a never-ending horror show. About 3% of women face the torment of hyperemesis gravidarum (HG), while many endure severe morning sickness. I’ve had the misfortune of experiencing HG with all four of my pregnancies, each more challenging than the last. HG is not your run-of-the-mill morning sickness; it’s a different beast entirely. I wouldn’t wish it upon my worst enemy.
Unfortunately, many people don’t understand this and often assume that you’re simply exaggerating typical morning sickness. When I heard that celebrity Jessica was hospitalized for HG, I felt a sense of relief. Maybe it would raise awareness and create some empathy for those suffering. Despite this, you’ll still encounter individuals who say the most thoughtless things. Here are ten of the most cringe-worthy remarks I frequently heard:
- Just eat crackers before you get out of bed.
Wow, what a revelation! If only I had enough saliva in my dehydrated body, I might be able to chew those magical saltines. Genius move, really! - Being really sick means the baby is healthy.
Uhh… not quite! My illness doesn’t guarantee a healthy baby; it just means I’m incredibly unwell. - If you’re really sick, it’s a girl!
I’ve had HG four times, and I have four boys. Case closed. - You’ll forget all about this once the baby arrives!
There’s some truth to this, akin to “labor amnesia.” To ensure I wouldn’t forget, I had my partner snap a photo of me pushing my IV pole around. Just a little reminder for when I start to think about baby number five! - You can’t lose weight while pregnant and have a healthy baby.
Oh yes, you can! If you’re living off ice chips, it’s entirely possible to pack on pounds when you can finally eat. - If you don’t eat anything, your baby won’t grow.
The human body is incredibly resourceful and can convert fat and muscle into a baby—even if you’re on a diet of popsicles for weeks. - It never lasts all nine months. You’ll be fine in a week or two.
Nope! And just so you know, throwing up at nine months pregnant is a whole new level of awful that you can’t prepare for. - That medicine you’re taking to curb the nausea isn’t safe for you or your baby.
Please. Modern medicine says otherwise, and so do my healthy kids who arrived after taking those meds. - Are you enjoying your pregnancy? Isn’t it the best?
Of course! My body is a festival of sickness, depression, and fatigue. What’s not to love?
So what should you say to a struggling mama? Ask her, “What can I do to help?” Then actually follow through! Whether it’s shopping for a variety of sports drinks or making ten different versions of plain rice, just remind her this phase won’t last forever. And the silver lining? It all culminates in the day you meet your new baby.
For more information on pregnancy, check out this excellent resource from the CDC. And if you’re considering options for family planning, you might find our other blog posts helpful, like this one on intracervical insemination. For those looking for a more hands-on approach, check out Make a Mom’s guide to various kits available.
Summary
Navigating pregnancy with severe morning sickness can be a daunting experience, especially when others offer well-meaning but misguided advice. It’s essential to approach pregnant women with empathy and support, asking how you can help rather than contributing to their distress with clichés and assumptions.