7 Sneaky Ways My Kids Get Their Way

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Just as parents learn to navigate the intricate personalities of their children, my kids have become experts at exploiting my weaknesses. It’s like we have our own secret code—one they’ve mastered to get what they want. I’m well aware of their tactics, yet I still find myself succumbing to their charms. Here are some classic strategies they use that leave me feeling like a total softie:

1. Bedtime Shenanigans
   When they want to extend their bedtime, they know just the trick. They flip the TV to HGTV, a channel I can’t resist. As I get entranced by the transformation of a dilapidated house into a dream home, they exchange sly glances and one of them curls up next to me, playing with my hair. It’s a surefire way to score an extra hour of screen time.
2. Caffeine Cravings
   My kids are well aware of my coffee addiction. When I’m desperate for a caffeine fix, they suggest a stop at McDonald’s for a cheap soda. They cleverly propose I let them grab something from the Dollar Menu. Before I know it, I’m guzzling my third soda while they happily wait for their ice cream cones.
3. Target Temptations
   Every time we step into Target, my kids suddenly “need” something from the Dollar Spot. I try to resist, but the promise of a back rub when we get home is hard to ignore. “Fine, take my money, but that foot rub better be worth it!” How have I not been reported to CPS yet?
4. Post-Punishment Compliments
   After I’ve had it with their mischief, they spring into action with compliments that could rival a Hallmark card. They tell me how beautiful I am and how I should buy those shoes I’ve been eyeing. Somehow, this makes me feel guilty for being too tough, and I forget that they’re just trying to sweeten me up before I execute their punishment.
5. Fear Factor
   When they express fear, my heart sinks. I remember my oldest being terrified on his first bus ride, and I jumped on with him. But I know now that many of their fears are just excuses to come downstairs multiple times after bedtime. I’ve let that one slide far too many times.
6. “Sick” at Dinnertime
   If my kids don’t like what’s for dinner, they suddenly feel “sick.” I used to insist they eat, but after my daughter once threw up after I forced her to finish her eggs, I’ve learned this tactic is not worth the risk.
7. The “Ouch” Trick
   Whenever they claim something hurts, I drop everything to investigate. It’s usually just a minor scrape that requires a Band-Aid. But this also comes with a demand for a popsicle, which they seem to miraculously recover from right after. Classic.

This little dance we do might not be something to brag about, but it certainly has its benefits. I get to enjoy unexpected perks as a parent, while my kids hone their skills at persuasion. Once you’ve bribed a child into giving you a foot rub, there’s no turning back!

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Summary

In this playful exploration of parenting, I reveal how my kids have mastered the art of manipulation to get what they want. From bedtime tactics and caffeine cravings to cleverly timed compliments, these strategies showcase the delicate balance of power between parents and children. As much as I may be a pushover, I can’t deny the laughter and lessons that come with it.