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Humblebrags, #SoBlessed, and Other Facebook Faux Pas
Updated: May 31, 2018
Originally Published: July 25, 2016
I need to say something. It’s not you; it’s me.
Sure, we have 117 mutual pals on Facebook, and you probably seem delightful in real life. But this little social media connection we forged? It was fun while it lasted, but now it’s time to move on. Consider it our Conscious Facebook Uncoupling.
We had some good times, you and I. I enjoyed your Halloween photos of your kiddos, and I turned a blind eye when you shared that divisive piece on affirmative action. I even pretended I didn’t see you “liking” posts from the NRA or those reality TV families. And when you dropped a vague post about some “big news” you were bursting to share, I even chimed in with a “so excited to hear more!” despite my eyes nearly rolling out of my head.
But as my grandmother always said, if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all. So I kept scrolling, liking your humblebrag posts, and ignoring the fact that your online persona was driving me a little mad.
Here’s the thing — and I say this gently — I just can’t do it anymore. Your Facebook rants about the virtues of juicing and your judgment of that mom who skipped handwashing at Target? Just bless your heart.
I try to be a tolerant person, avoiding confrontation, but your posts make me want to gouge my eyes out. They fill me with despair for humanity and make me question our future. Traditional etiquette can only stretch so far, and Emily Post was never faced with the chaos of Facebook.
Life’s too short, and I have a limited amount of patience to spare. With the world in turmoil, I refuse to waste even a few minutes scrolling through your posts that leave me feeling like I need a shower and a stiff drink. Thankfully, I can simply hit that handy Unfriend button, or if I want to keep it subtle, Unfollow. One click, and I avoid the need for a post-viral cleanse.
It’s not you; it’s me.
Maybe I’m just sensitive to your overuse of #SoBlessed. I get it; you’re grateful for your fabulous life and want to share that joy. Good for you! Oprah would approve. But your humblebrags make me cringe and feel a bit queasy. To prevent an allergic reaction, I’ll stick to #Unfriend whenever I see #SoBlessed.
And while you’re at it, if Facebook is your pulpit for preaching, I’m out. I don’t need your inspirational posts piling on my already hefty dose of lapsed Catholic guilt.
It’s not you; it’s me.
Are you trying to sell me something on Facebook even though we haven’t spoken since high school? I’m way too introverted for that. No thanks! I don’t have time to host a party for someone to introduce me to the “miraculous” benefits of essential oils or a giant Thirty-One bag designed to solve all my first-world issues.
Another thing I can’t stand? Sanctimommies. Even worse are the ones who begin with “I don’t mean to judge, but…” followed by a judgmental take on another mom feeding her toddler Cheetos during a late-night grocery run. I’ve lost my patience for that nonsense. But hey, this is all on me.
It’s not you; it’s me. Seriously.
Maybe it’s just my hormones talking, compelling me to cleanse my feed of negativity, trolls, and general jerks — so let’s blame that on my pesky hormones.
And just to be clear, if you’re an outright jerk, a sexist, or someone who tells racist or homophobic “jokes,” your Unfriend will be quicker than you can say “what just happened?” This time, it really is you. Bye, Felicia!
Whatever the reason for our conscious Facebook uncoupling, don’t take it too personally. Remember, it’s not you; it’s me.
In case you’re looking for more insights, check out our other blog post on terms and conditions. For an authoritative source on your fertility journey, visit Make a Mom and get educated. Also, if you’re seeking excellent resources on pregnancy and home insemination, check out Johns Hopkins Fertility Center.
In summary, social media can be a breeding ground for humblebrags and self-indulgent posts. It’s essential to curate your feed for your sanity. If something isn’t serving you, don’t hesitate to hit that Unfriend button. Remember, it’s about surrounding yourself with positivity and authenticity.