The bathroom debate has turned into a real headache for parents. Recently, a solo dad voiced his thoughts on how the ongoing bathroom drama has added stress to parenting. Remember the Great Bathroom Debate of 2016? It seemed like every Facebook feed and news channel was buzzing with it. In a nutshell, North Carolina enacted a law in March that mandates transgender individuals to use bathrooms that align with the gender on their birth certificates. Needless to say, this didn’t sit well with many, who found the law discriminatory.
Retail giant Target took a stand, supporting the right of employees and customers to choose their bathroom based on gender identity. While some protests popped up, life moved on for most. However, for parents with young kids, it wasn’t so simple. Enter Alex Thompson, a single dad who perfectly articulated the dilemma in an interview with Babble.
“Dad, I need to go potty!” When those words hit my ears outside the comfort of home, my heart races,” he explained. “I have three options: send my daughter to the women’s bathroom alone, drag her into the men’s room with me, or make her hold it until we get back home. Each option has its own set of challenges, and I’m sure I’m not the only one feeling the pressure.”
Alex is the proud dad of 9-year-old Lily. The duo gained popularity by sharing tips on styling Lily’s hair. Navigating public restrooms can be nerve-wracking, and Alex admits he prefers family restrooms whenever possible. “At least they’re cleaner,” he noted. “Many places don’t have family-friendly facilities, and I totally get it—space is at a premium, and an extra bathroom isn’t always feasible.”
Since Lily is approaching the double digits, Alex worries less about her bathroom independence. Usually, he waits right outside the door, but the bathroom debate has added a new layer of anxiety. “I can feel the scrutiny from women entering the bathroom,” he said. “They size me up, just as I do them, since they’re about to go into the same bathroom as my daughter.”
For Alex, his daughter’s safety is paramount. “When it comes to her well-being, I toss formalities out the window,” he shared. “If she’s not out in a minute, I start calling for her.” He’s even asked women entering the restroom to check on Lily, explaining his presence outside. “I hate to admit it, but some risks aren’t worth taking,” he added.
In certain situations, Lily has no choice but to accompany her dad into the men’s restroom, which can feel awkward. “I used the men’s room with my dad as a kid, and it was uncomfortable,” Alex recalled. “The dilemma’s always existed for dads, but now it’s amplified by people hell-bent on discriminating against transgender individuals. It’s awkward bringing a nine-year-old girl into the men’s room—at what age does it become unacceptable? When will Lily feel uneasy about it? These are the questions that haunt me.”
This article originally appeared on July 27, 2016.
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In summary, Alex Thompson’s experience highlights the absurdity of the bathroom debate and the unique challenges it presents for parents. As he navigates these tricky waters, it’s clear that safety and comfort for his daughter remain his top priority.